Tag: negativity

Rejoice instead of Complain (Philippians 2:14-18, 3:1-4a)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year ALeave a comment

Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.” Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky as you hold firmly to the word of life. And then I will be able to boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor in vain. But even if I am being poured out like a drink offering on the sacrifice and service coming from your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you. So you too should be glad and rejoice with me…

Further, my brothers and sisters, rejoice in the Lord! It is no trouble for me to write the same things to you again, and it is a safeguard for you. Watch out for those dogs, those evildoers, those mutilators of the flesh. For it is we who are the circumcision, we who serve God by his Spirit, who boast in Christ Jesus, and who put no confidence in the flesh—though I myself have reasons for such confidence. (New International Version)

Here is a simple observation: Complaining and rejoicing cannot come out of the same mouth at the same time. The two of them mix about as well as toasters and bathtubs.

Everything is to be done without grumbling or arguing. Sheer willpower is insufficient for the task. Instead, you and I need to replace words of complaint with words of joy. Rejoicing is the antidote to murmuring. The world already has more than enough curmudgeons who crank on about everything from politics and religion to the weather and social media. Grumblers seem to always find the negative in just about everything.

Any fool can complain. It’s easy. Complaining takes little effort, and even less brains. Joy, however, takes some work. The sage person practices gratitude and joy so that it becomes the default response to most situations. We need a lot more folks with joy in this sad world.

Yesterday I visited a dear woman who was just diagnosed with cancer, and is expected to have only months to live. She had many tears, yet she also had lots of smiles. In fact, she was either crying or smiling most of the time. And her smile was genuine, not forced.

Whenever I encounter folks like this, who do not complain but rather rejoice, I ask them, “What gives you such joy in the midst of such sorrow?” This particular woman answered, “I have a simple faith. I trust God. I believe the Lord is good. I am blessed with many friends, a supportive family, and a God who loves me.” May her tribe increase.

On this same day, I visited another woman. She also had just been diagnosed with cancer and was facing a shortened lifespan. She yelled at the doctor and argued with the nurse, screamed at and quarreled with her family, and cried without any joy in my presence. Eventually, she left the hospital against medical advice because all she did was complain about everything and everyone.

Although I believe it is quite appropriate to have anger against disease, it’s inappropriate to rage against other people. The woman was miserable and had no smiles. I couldn’t help but see the incredible contrast between the two women in a single day of visits.

For all the talk we hear about how important it is to be positive, it is, unfortunately, negativity that sells, wins elections, and moves people. The irony of it all is that a large chunk of people continually grumbles, complains, and argues about all the negativity in the world. *Sigh*

Complaining and arguing are nasty practices; they breed disunity and division within groups and families. Murmuring only warps the ones who do it and infects others with spiritual disease.

Grumbling is always the first building block of a crooked and depraved generation. Conversely, being blameless and pure is winsomely attractive and unites folks together as a cohesive force for the world. Joy inoculates people from divisive pathogens. A people who rejoice together produce generations of individuals who impact their culture with delight and satisfaction.

Not even suffering and hard circumstances can curtail the comfort and cheer of the joyful. Rejoicing is a way of life – a path which no one and nothing can take away from us. Unwanted situations can be imposed on us, yet a person’s joy cannot be dislodged.

Eleanor Porter’s 1913 storybook character, Pollyanna, learned to take such a look upon life from her parents. Even after losing them to an accident and being orphaned, she honored their memory by saying, “… there is something about everything that you can be glad about, if you keep hunting long enough to find it.” Pollyanna went on to teach an entire community about her way of life:

“What people need is encouragement. Their natural resisting powers should be strengthened, not weakened…. Instead of always harping on a person’s faults, tell them of their virtues. Try to pull them out of their rut of bad habits. Hold up to them their better self, the real self that can dare and do and win out! … The influence of a beautiful, helpful, hopeful character is contagious, and may revolutionize a whole town…. People radiate what is in their minds and in their hearts. If a person feels kindly and obliging, their neighbors will feel that way, too. But if a person scolds and scowls and criticizes—their neighbors will return scowl for scowl and add interest! … When you look for the bad, expecting it, you will get it. When you know you will find the good—you will get that…”

Pollyanna, by Eleanor H. Porter, 1913

I wonder what our world would look like if we all took such an approach of finding joy in our lives. We are meant to guard ourselves from those who boast and brag, who belligerently bully others with their bellicose blustering and bellyaching.

We are designed by our Creator for better things. Joy is more than the spice of life; it is life itself. Moving mindfully and without rush through our days, setting aside times for contemplation and rest, offering gratitude to God and encouragement to others, and exploring our own heart’s desire are all ways we can tap into the large hidden reservoir of joy within each of us.

Complaining is cheap and easy. Joy is rich, full, satisfying, and takes practice to master. Rejoice in the Lord, take joy in the presence of the Spirit, and exult in Christ our Savior. In doing so, we shoo the devil away and create a better society.

God is good all the time. And all the time God is good.

O Lord, you have searched me out and known me; you know my sitting down and my rising up; you discern my thoughts from afar. You mark out my journeys and my resting place and are acquainted with all my ways. Lord of creation, whose glory is around and within us: Open our eyes to your wonders so that we may serve you with reverence and know your peace and joy in our lives, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Get Rid of Grumbling (Numbers 11:1-9)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year ALeave a comment

Now the people complained about their hardships in the hearing of the Lord, and when he heard them his anger was aroused. Then fire from the Lord burned among them and consumed some of the outskirts of the camp. When the people cried out to Moses, he prayed to the Lord and the fire died down. So that place was called Taberah because fire from the Lord had burned among them.

The rabble with them began to crave other food, and again the Israelites started wailing and said, “If only we had meat to eat! We remember the fish we ate in Egypt at no cost—also the cucumbers, melons, leeks, onions and garlic. But now we have lost our appetite; we never see anything but this manna!”

The manna was like coriander seed and looked like resin. The people went around gathering it, and then ground it in a hand mill or crushed it in a mortar. They cooked it in a pot or made it into loaves. And it tasted like something made with olive oil. When the dew settled on the camp at night, the manna also came down. (New International Version)

Some complaints are a form of lamenting a significant loss and expressing grief. That’s normal, even healthy, and to be expected. Many other complaints come in the form of grumbling, murmuring, and just plain old selfish bellyaching.

The latter type of complaining is clearly what was happening with the ancient Israelites. They were delivered from Egyptian slavery and now free. The people ought to be celebrating. But instead, the minute things are hard, they grumble. When the God-given food became commonplace and too plain for their pallets, the people whined and complained.

And it was the rabble rousers among them who got the whole community up in arms and grumbling.

The Apostle Paul understood that negative people only create more negative people – which is why he offered the church leader Titus some counsel about how to handle such persons: 

After a first and second warning, have nothing more to do with a person who causes conflict, because you know that someone like this is twisted and sinful—so they condemn themselves. (Titus 3:10-11, CEB)

Whenever a passion for power and control prevails over a desire for the common good of all people, then we have an issue of character. Stirring up antagonism against biblically-oriented, Spirit-directed change is demonic – and the real test of it is a constant stream of negativism which is secretive, remains in the shadows, relies on gossip and slander for its fuel, and hates being in the light.

Jesus said to be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves because there are wolves among the sheep (Matthew 10:16). You will know them by their fruit. We are called not to participate in negative influences!  Individuals must be called-out for their chronic negative spirits. So, how do we do it?  How do we shut-out the negative?

Refuse it

Name it. Call it what it is: fighting against the Holy Spirit and attributing evil to the work of God (Matthew 12:30-32). When someone comes to you and wants to dish up a little “sumthin’-sumthin’” on somebody or something, refuse to take the bait. Refuse it and reject it.

Keep a group of friends who are positive, encouraging, helpful, and steer clear of antagonistic attitudes. It is extremely beneficial to both physical and spiritual health. In a study at Stanford University, a pair of researchers reviewed over 200 studies on group therapy and concluded that group members “develop close bonds with the other members and are deeply influenced by their positive acceptance and feedback.” In other words, negative thinking keeps people in bondage, whereas positive encouragement of others brings freedom and life.

Rebuke it

Someone might be speaking to you, start talking around some issue slowly, but eventually comes around to carving up another person like a Thanksgiving turkey. What do you do? Rebuke it. We can say something like, “When you continue to speak with such negativity about ______ I feel upset because I need to be in a place which helps me to spiritually grow. Will you please stop being so negative?”

I once had a person come to me not knowing how to deal with a negative person. I walked him through some biblical ways about confronting the negativity when it comes. He simply hung his head and said he could not do that. But he was miserable, which is why he came and talked to me. And he walked away with that same misery because he was not willing to call out a person on their destructive negativity.

You and I are in control of our own happiness. If another person causes us anger; if some politician drives us nuts; if a television program or radio show is upsetting me; then, it is our responsibility to keep away.

If we have a chronic negative person in our life, and have tried to deal with that person, and they refuse to listen, we can say something like this when they start their rant: “I don’t want to hear it. And if you keep bringing it up and being negative, I will walk out of the room.” The principle here is that we control our own behavior, not somebody else’s.

Redirect it

Satan is the author of negative antagonism. He talked trash about God in the garden to Adam and Eve. So, avoid getting caught up in trying to dialogue with a negative person. Redirect the negativity by calling the person to change their ways, because truth be told, the negativity is really rebellion against God.

If you are wondering, “I could never do that” then you likely have been telling yourself a lot of negative thoughts. God calls us to stamp-out the negativity before it can get started, even within our own brains. In some cases, we need to re-train our minds to focus on the positive, and not the negative.

It takes two to tango. Negativity cannot survive if there is no one to listen to it. We must stop being negative and stop listening to negative people; constant complaining creates divisions and scandals.

If there are people who chronically have negative speech and can never seem to say anything good about someone or something, then stay away from them. Have nothing to do with them. Do not participate in the divisive speech. Refuse it. Rebuke it. Redirect it.

God wants us righteous and robust, holy, and happy – not walking around like a grump who was baptized in pickle juice.

We can choose to fill our minds with gracious good news; pray positively about everything; and find the positive in all things. We can continually choose to cultivate unity, purity, peace, and love. That’s how we enjoy life together.

May it be so, to the glory of God.

Broken and Poured Out (Matthew 26:6-13)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year ALeave a comment

Jesus was in Bethany at the house of Simon the leper. While he was there, a woman came to him. She had an alabaster jar filled with expensive perfume. She poured the perfume on Jesus’ head while he was eating.

The followers saw the woman do this and were upset at her. They said, “Why waste that perfume? It could be sold for a lot of money, and the money could be given to those who are poor.”

But Jesus knew what happened. He said, “Why are you bothering this woman? She did a very good thing for me. You will always have the poor with you. But you will not always have me. This woman poured perfume on my body. She did this to prepare me for burial after I die. The Good News will be told to people all over the world. And I can assure you that everywhere the Good News is told, the story of what this woman did will also be told, and people will remember her.” (Easy-to-Read Version)

It seems that much of the world’s default response to events right in front of their eyes is to be judgmental, binary, and negative – as if everything is a simple sum of right and wrong, good and bad – and all adjudicated by our perceptions and perspectives on it.

The disciples reflexively moralized the actions of the woman and her jar of expensive perfume. What a waste, they believed. They thought they knew better and could do better.

But there was more going on in today’s Gospel lesson than what meets the eye. In the Apostle John’s account, the woman in the story is identified as Mary, a woman with a sordid background who had her life transformed through meeting Jesus. (John 12:1-11)

Near the end of Christ’s life, as he was about to enter Jerusalem and be arrested, tried, tortured, and killed, this woman, Mary, is aware of what is happening when others are not, even the disciples of Jesus. Her own brokenness cracked open to her the true reality of life.

The surface event itself is a touching and tender moment in history. This woman, whom everyone knew was a damaged person, took a high-end perfume and broke the entire thing open. She then proceeded to anoint Christ’s feet with it. You can imagine the aroma which filled the entire house with expensive perfume for all to smell. 

The woman, Mary, was affirmed by Jesus for seeing the situation as a possibility and opportunity of loving her Lord. Mary alone had the vision amongst all the disciples, and the accompanying action, to enter through the door of risk in order to connect intimately and lovingly with Jesus.

Mary’s love, radiating outward for all to see, reflected the genuine love of God for the world – a love so great that Jesus would soon experience death and burial because of that love for humanity.

The disciples were grumping and cursing about the right way to do things; whereas Jesus blessed the woman with no reference whatsoever to morality or ethics. Mary had no concern for playing the numbers game and counting money, but instead focused on the ultimate value before her.

Giving what she had to Jesus, Mary demonstrated the path of true discipleship. She helps open our eyes to the realities which are right in front of us:

  • The broken jar of perfume shows us her brokenness and our need to be broken. (Matthew 5:3-4)
  • An extraordinary and extravagant amount of perfume was used, picturing her overflowing love for Jesus. (John 20:1-18)
  • The perfume was poured on the head of Jesus, and she herself used her hair as the application (according to John); hair is a rich cultural symbol for submission and respect. (1 Corinthians 11:14)
  • The perfume directs us to the death of Jesus. (John 19:38-42)
  • The perfume highlights for us the aroma of Christ to the world. (2 Corinthians 2:15-17)
  • There is more to the disciples’ response than mere words about perfume; the Apostle John specifically names Judas as questioning this action – the one who is not actually concerned for the poor. (Matthew 26:15)
  • The woman and the disciples (specifically, Judas and Mary) serve as spiritual contrasts: Mary opens herself to the sweet aroma of Christ; Judas just plain stinks.
  • The perfume presents a powerful picture of the upcoming death of Christ, for those with eyes to see; he was broken and poured out for our salvation. (Luke 23:26-27:12)

Christianity was never meant to be a surface religion which only runs skin deep. The follower of Christ is meant to be transformed, inside and out, so that there is genuine healing, spiritual wellness, and authentic concern for the poor and needy. 

Keeping up appearances is what the Judas’s of this world do. However, the Mary’s among us dramatically point to Jesus with their tears, their humility, their openness, and their love.

In this contemporary environment of fragmented human ecology, our first step toward wholeness and integrity begins with a posture of giving everything we have – body, soul, and spirit – to the Lord Jesus. In receiving the love of God, we can then freely give that love to a world locked in the shackles of tunnel vision, judgmentalism, and incessant moralizing.

To take the risk of breaking ourselves open and becoming vulnerable, we find love. In finding love, there we see intimacy. And where there is intimacy, there is the relational connection which transforms the dark and the negative to possibility and light.

Loving Lord Jesus, my Savior, and my friend, you have gone before us and pioneered deliverance from an empty way of life and into a life of grace and gratitude. May I, and all of your followers, emulate the path of Mary and realize the true freedom which comes from emptying oneself out for you. Amen.

Philippians 2:14-18, 3:1-4 – Rejoicing versus Complaining

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year ALeave a comment

Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.” Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky as you hold firmly to the word of life. And then I will be able to boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor in vain. But even if I am being poured out like a drink offering on the sacrifice and service coming from your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you. So, you too should be glad and rejoice with me…. 

Further, my brothers and sisters, rejoice in the Lord! It is no trouble for me to write the same things to you again, and it is a safeguard for you. Watch out for those dogs, those evildoers, those mutilators of the flesh. For it is we who are the circumcision, we who serve God by his Spirit, who boast in Christ Jesus, and who put no confidence in the flesh— though I myself have reasons for such confidence. (NIV) 

Here is a simple observation: Complaining and rejoicing cannot come out of the same mouth at the same time. The two of them mix about as well as toasters and bathtubs. Everything is to be done without grumbling or arguing. Sheer willpower is insufficient for the task. No, instead, you and I need to replace words of complaint with words of joy. Rejoicing is the antidote to murmuring. The world already has more than enough curmudgeons who crank on about everything from politics and religion to the weather and social media. Grumblers seem to always find the negative in just about everything. 

Any fool can complain. It is easy. Joy, however, takes some work. The sage person practices gratitude and joy so that it becomes the default response to most situations. We need more folks like this in the world. For all the talk we hear about how important it is to be positive, it is negativity that sells, wins elections, and moves people. The irony of it all is that a large chunk of people continually grumbles, complains, and argues about all the negativity in the world. *Sigh* 

Complaining and arguing are nasty practices because they breed disunity and division within groups and families. Murmuring only warps the ones who do it and infects others with spiritual disease. Grumbling is always the first building block of a crooked and depraved generation. Conversely, being blameless and pure is winsomely attractive and unites folks together as a cohesive force for the world. Joy inoculates people from divisive pathogens. A people who rejoice together produce generations of individuals who impact their culture with delight and satisfaction. 

Not even suffering and hard circumstances can curtail the comfort and cheer of the joyful. Rejoicing is a way of life – a path which no one and nothing can take away from us. Unwanted situations can be imposed on us, yet a person’s joy cannot be dislodged. Eleanor Porter’s 1913 storybook character, Pollyanna, learned to take such a look upon life from her parents. Even after losing them and being orphaned, she honored their memory by saying, “… there is something about everything that you can be glad about, if you keep hunting long enough to find it.” Pollyanna went on to teach an entire community about her way of life: 

“What people need is encouragement. Their natural resisting powers should be strengthened, not weakened…. Instead of always harping on a person’s faults, tell them of their virtues. Try to pull them out of their rut of bad habits. Hold up to them their better self, the real self that can dare and do and win out! … The influence of a beautiful, helpful, hopeful character is contagious, and may revolutionize a whole town…. People radiate what is in their minds and in their hearts. If a person feels kindly and obliging, their neighbors will feel that way, too. But if a person scolds and scowls and criticizes—their neighbors will return scowl for scowl and add interest! … When you look for the bad, expecting it, you will get it. When you know you will find the good—you will get that…” 

I wonder what our world would look like if we all took such an approach of finding joy in our lives. We are meant to guard ourselves from those who boast and brag, who belligerently bully others with their bellicose blustering and bellyaching.  

We are designed by our Creator for better things. Joy is more than the spice of life; it is life itself. Moving mindfully and without rush through our days, setting aside times for contemplation and rest, offering gratitude to God and encouragement to others, and exploring our own heart’s desire are all ways we can tap into the large hidden reservoir of joy within each of us. 

Complaining is cheap and easy. Joy is rich, full, satisfying, and takes practice to master. Rejoice in the Lord, take joy in the presence of the Spirit, and exult in Christ our Savior. In doing so, we shoo the devil away and create a better society. 

God is good all the time. And all the time God is good. 

O Lord, you have searched me out and known me; you know my sitting down and my rising up; you discern my thoughts from afar. You mark out my journeys and my resting place and are acquainted with all my ways. Lord of creation, whose glory is around and within us: Open our eyes to your wonders so that we may serve you with reverence and know your peace and joy in our lives, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.