Dealing with Depression (1 Kings 19:9-18)

There he went into a cave and spent the night.

And the word of the Lord came to him: “What are you doing here, Elijah?”

He replied, “I have been very zealous for the Lord God Almighty. The Israelites have rejected your covenant, torn down your altars, and put your prophets to death with the sword. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too.”

The Lord said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.”

Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.

Then a voice said to him, “What are you doing here, Elijah?”

He replied, “I have been very zealous for the Lord God Almighty. The Israelites have rejected your covenant, torn down your altars, and put your prophets to death with the sword. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too.”

The Lord said to him, “Go back the way you came, and go to the Desert of Damascus. When you get there, anoint Hazael king over Aram. Also, anoint Jehu son of Nimshi king over Israel, and anoint Elisha son of Shaphat from Abel Meholah to succeed you as prophet. Jehu will put to death any who escape the sword of Hazael, and Elisha will put to death any who escape the sword of Jehu. Yet I reserve seven thousand in Israel—all whose knees have not bowed down to Baal and whose mouths have not kissed him.” (New International Version)

The prophet Elijah was downright exhausted – so much so, that he became debilitatingly depressed.

After being alone for long stretches of time, always vigilant to watch out for those who sought his life, experiencing an intense victory against some truly evil folks, and then back to being on high alert, Elijah was done.

Depression is real. It isn’t limited to a certain personality trait, and it isn’t in itself sin. It just is. More than half of people in the United States with serious depression, and even more worldwide, do not receive or will not get adequate help. 

So, if you are reading this as a depressed person, or are wondering how to help someone you care for who is depressed, it is imperative that you get help immediately. A blog post on such an important subject can really only encourage you, and somehow inspire you, to take the brave and bold step of seeking the assistance you need. 

Severe depression is profoundly crippling and is as important to deal with as prostate cancer; both can kill you on the inside even though no one knows on the outside.

I myself have experienced two major depressions in the course of my life. I’ve also had a few kidney stones. I’m told the pain of a kidney stone is like childbirth.  I don’t know about the childbirth thing, but I do know that I would rather experience a dozen kidney stones, at once, than go through another severe depression. I got help, and it changed my life. 

Depression is exactly what the name implies: a depressing or a stuffing of feelings – particularly the emotion of anger. I was so good at packing down my emotions that one night, many years ago when our neighbor had a blow-out of a party at 2am in the morning, I actually felt no anger. Just so you know: that’s not healthy. I had an anger problem. Not the kind where you explode, but just the opposite – the kind where you stuff every negative feeling in the book.

Recovery for me looked a lot like what Elijah experienced. I needed to acknowledge what was actually inside of me and begin sitting with those unwanted emotions. And I need to tell you that what was inside me wasn’t at all pretty. 

Like a wound that needs peroxide, dealing with depression hurt like hell. But I couldn’t heal without it. I couldn’t go around it, or avoid it; I had to go through it. Eventually, I learned to not only identify my feelings, but to own them and take charge of them. 

I discovered I could choose to say how I feel without apology, and I could say it all in a way that helped others, as well as myself. Holy Scripture calls it speaking the truth in love.

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go;
    I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.

Psalm 32:8, NIV

Waiting for the perfect time to deal with depression will only result in deeper despondency. You are not responsible for what others may say or do, and you cannot control other people’s decisions and responses to you – trying to do so is manipulative and only creates more problems. 

Elijah wasn’t alone in dealing with depression. David and Jeremiah went through some very difficult days of being depressed. Even Jesus became stressed and despondent. But none of them stayed there, and their experiences changed not only themselves but readers of God’s Word throughout history. 

It only makes sense to tell a trusted spiritual leader, friend, or relative how you are really feeling. One does not crawl out of the abyss of darkness that is depression without some sage people surrounding the person. They can offer wise counsel, focused prayer, and careful application of Scripture. 

This is one reason why church ministry exists, so let the church do its redemptive work. So, may the clouds roll away into the hope of a new tomorrow.

Almighty God, whose Son took upon himself the afflictions of your people: Regard with your tender compassion those suffering from depression; bear their sorrows and their care; supply all their needs; help them to put their whole trust and confidence in you; and restore them to strength of mind and cheerfulness of spirit; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

How Can I Live a Pure Life? (Psalm 119:9-16)

Statue of Saint Valentine in Terni, Umbria, Italy

How can a young person live a pure life?
    By obeying your word.
I try with all my heart to serve you.
    Help me obey your commands.
I study your teachings very carefully
    so that I will not sin against you.
Lord, you are worthy of praise!
    Teach me your laws.
I will repeat the laws we have heard from you.
I enjoy following your rules
    as much as others enjoy great riches.
I will study your instructions.
    I will give thought to your way of life.
I enjoy your laws.
    I will not forget your word. (Easy-To-Read Version)

There was an actual Saint Valentine (c.226-269 C.E.) who lived and served as a Bishop in Rome. The Roman Emperor of the time, Claudius II, was vehemently opposed to Christianity. Claudius forbad Christian marriages from taking place – which was something Bishop Valentine was unwilling to do, and was supposedly jailed for his refusal to stop performing Christian weddings. Hence, one of the reasons for Valentine being the patron saint of lovers.

That’s certainly one way of helping to keep young Christians pure. I, in fact, have more than once advocated on behalf of a young couple in love. Their parents, who wanted a large wedding and plenty of time to prepare for it, simply didn’t realize what they were asking of their kids and how much that put them in an awkward position.

To be pure means to be holy or set apart for a special or specific purpose. Christians are to be completely devoted to their Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. In order to do that, they will need to pay particular attention to God’s commands and Christ’s teachings.

The Will

The whole person must be involved in obeying the teachings given to us. It begins with our will. Notice that the psalmist sets his resolve toward this great task by stating:

  • I will repeat (out loud) the divine laws I hear
  • I will study God’s instructions
  • I will give thought to my way of life with Yahweh
  • I will not forget the Lord’s words

I have considered my ways
    and have turned my steps to your statutes.
I will hasten and not delay
    to obey your commands. (Psalm 119:59-60, NIV)

We need strong affirmations toward engaging our will toward reading aloud, studying, and remembering biblical commands, so that we will succeed in our quest for purity and holiness.

The Emotions

Our affections also need to be involved. We are emotional creatures, having been formed by a Creator with deep feelings. Therefore, our own emotions are meant to be acknowledged and engaged. The psalmist enjoys God’s Law and is emotionally draw to it’s beauty and light.

Oh, how I love your law!
    I meditate on it all day long.
Your commands are always with me
    and make me wiser than my enemies. (Psalm 119:97-98, NIV)

We need strong feelings toward desiring God’s Word, so that there will be effective action toward a life of purity. Overall, we do what we want. Continually doing something we don’t really want to do ends up being either legalistic or loathsome.

The Body

Our bodies are the vehicles to doing and accomplishing God’s will on this earth. Thus, our physical selves must be animated toward the good, the right, and the just. The psalmist worshiped and praised God.

I, by your great love,
    can come into your house;
in reverence I bow down
    toward your holy temple. (Psalm 5:7, NIV)

Hear my cry for mercy
    as I call to you for help,
as I lift up my hands
    toward your Most Holy Place. (Psalm 28:2, NIV)

Our bodies need to move in physical rhythms of praise and worship to God, so that there will be purity of life. Holiness needs hands and feet to walk into the way of the Lord and obey God’s commands.

Philosophies of Purity

There are some unsound approaches to becoming pure and remaining holy:

  1. It’s up to me. God is too far away, maybe even absent altogether. This is a philosophy which ignores the gut. Yet, if we seek to connect with our innards, we’ll discover quickly that purity is not all on me. I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, then you will produce much fruit. Without me, you can’t do anything. (John 15:5, CEB)
  2. Follow your heart. Doing this has significance; however, if that’s the exclusive approach to purity, the mind gets left behind and the heart ends up vulnerable to deceit. The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? (Jeremiah 17:9, ESV)
  3. Knowledge is power. Yes, of course it is; but by itself, knowledge puffs up. We need the affections, particularly love, or else we become brains-on-a-stick, denigrating the body as superfluous to spirituality. Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up. (1 Corinthians 8:1b, NRSV)
  4. Control everything. There are certainly forces in operation in this world; yet we are never called to try and manipulate them. We may will ourselves to do many things, yet God has control of all things. Humanity is called to self-control, which takes up all our energy because it’s no easy feat. For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age. (Titus 2:11-12, NIV)

A sound philosophy of being holy and pure recognizes that we need divine help in strengthening our faith; the assistance of others who can walk alongside us and provide encouragement; and the engagement of our entire person, utilizing all our faculties in order to live a life of purity. Obedience to God’s Word is vital to a holy life; and to obey requires our entire selves.

There is to be a marriage between God’s commands and human obedience. The world may forbade this, but much like St. Valentine, we’ll let love have its way – and not the ruler of this present evil age.

Shining the Light on Fear (Psalm 27:1-6)

The Lord is my light and my salvation.
        Should I fear anyone?
    The Lord is a fortress protecting my life.
        Should I be frightened of anything?
When evildoers come at me trying to eat me up—
    it’s they, my foes and my enemies,
    who stumble and fall!
If an army camps against me,
        my heart won’t be afraid.
    If war comes up against me,
        I will continue to trust in this:
    I have asked one thing from the Lord—
    it’s all I seek:
        to live in the Lord’s house all the days of my life,
        seeing the Lord’s beauty
        and constantly adoring his temple.
Because he will shelter me in his own dwelling
    during troubling times;
    he will hide me in a secret place in his own tent;
        he will set me up high, safe on a rock.

Now my head is higher than the enemies surrounding me,
    and I will offer sacrifices in God’s tent—
        sacrifices with shouts of joy!
    I will sing and praise the Lord. (Common English Bible)

Being afraid of the dark is a common fear. After all, whenever we cannot see anything around us, then we don’t know what’s really there – and that’s understandably frightening for most people. Typically, it’s not what we see that’s so scary; the scary stuff is what our imagination conjures up that’s out there in the dark, which we cannot see.

Kids, with their curiously active imaginations, tend to be fearful of the dark – which is why we parents, and grandparents, ensure there’s a nightlight for them so they can sleep. The light illumines their surroundings, reminding them of where they are; the light also helps them remember that we are with them.

As children of God, we need the same reminders. We must continually check-in with our internal selves, reorienting our lives around the reality that the Lord is present, that Jesus is our Immanuel, God with us.

Having the Light of the World surrounding us provides confidence that God is watching and will save us from whatever threatens our life. Indeed, being immersed in the Lord helps us snuggle down and realize our ultimate security blanket holds us tight.

Not only do we have confidence with God’s presence, but we are also fearless in the face of the most adverse and scary of circumstances. Knowing that God has our back enables us to accept, cope, and transcend overwhelming situations.

God protects because God is present.

Admittedly, we don’t have all the answers as to why the Lord sometimes seems absent in the midst of our trouble. That’s maybe because God is a Being, a Person, and not an insurance policy. Ultimately, personal presence and protection is a whole lot better than the impersonal and legal sort.

Which is why it’s important to delight in the Lord, to enjoy being in God’s house, to bask in the beauty of divine holiness, righteousness, and justice. With this as our way of life, we tend to better understand that not everything is necessarily going to go right but that the Lord is alongside us, giving strength and hope.

It’s important to note that divergent emotions can be held together. Many folks tend to believe that if there is fear within the heart, then faith, courage, and praise cannot exist. But nothing could be further from the truth.

The more likely scenario is that trying to suppress feelings of fear only results in becoming more afraid; thus, leading to forced or manufactured praise with little to no bravery behind it.

Instead, the sage thing to do is acknowledge whatever emotions bubble up for us. That is our inner spirit’s way of alerting us that we must pay attention to something. Ignoring the fear makes the monster under the bed more fearsome.

Being aware of the emotion and acknowledging it brings options and choices. Getting it out there to actually feel it means that now we can choose what we’re going to do with the emotion. Hiding the fear only gives it power; naming the fear gives us control over it.

This is one reason why I believe it is significant to read the psalms out loud; it provides more fortitude in dealing with what’s in front of us.

Holding both our fears and our faith together enables us to face our troubles with wisdom and courage. If attacked – whether it be spiritual, emotional, mental, or physical – the worst thing to do is grin and bear it or plaster a fake smile on your face.

It’s okay to be conflicted, to wonder what the heck is going on, to not know what’s up or down, to live with the seeming incongruence of emotions.

Healing comes through feeling, speaking, and acting – and not by suppressing emotions, keeping words bottled up inside, and acting as though everything is peachy keen when it isn’t. Expressing words of trust in the Lord, without having first expressed words describing our emotions, is a fool’s errand. If we trust God to answer a prayer, then we also need to trust God in hearing our real emotions.

God encourages honesty, sincerity, and feeling; the Lord disparages ingenuine offerings of praise and inauthentic gestures merely meant to fake-it-till-you-make-it. The psalmist encourages us to express all our emotions – whether “positive” or “negative” – and find the empathy, solidarity, and healing we need.

God is our light. So, let’s not keep him in the dark about our real selves.

God and the Human Condition (Romans 1:18-25)

For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and injustice of those who by their injustice suppress the truth. For what can be known about God is plain to them because God has made it plain to them. Ever since the creation of the world God’s eternal power and divine nature, invisible though they are, have been seen and understood through the things God has made.

So they are without excuse, for though they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their senseless hearts were darkened. Claiming to be wise, they became fools, and they exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling a mortal human or birds or four-footed animals or reptiles.

Therefore God gave them over in the desires of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves. They exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen. (New Revised Standard Version)

Exchanging Good for Bad

Nature abhors a vacuum. Everything is filled with something. If one thing is given up, another thing will take its place. Change is actually more like an exchange of one thing for another. Something is taken out, then replaced with something different.

We have exchanged:

  • Behavior that attends to the common good of all persons, for self-interested behavior to what is good for me and my family and/or group
  • Good deeds done from a pure heart, for good deeds done from an impure heart which give me an advantage or leverage over another
  • Steadfast committed love of others, for hustled love that gets discarded whenever things get hard
  • Submission to one another out of a sense of sacred reverence, for disobedience to anyone I don’t like
  • Dignity of being an image-bearer of God for the shame and ignominy of self-image
  • Majesty and worth of all persons in the world, for becoming masters of small worlds
Photo by Kindel Media on Pexels.com

And that’s not all, there’s more. We also have a nasty tendency to replace:

  • Freedom for shackles
  • Virtue for vice
  • Morality for immorality
  • Justice for injustice
  • Goodness for ungodliness
  • Truth for a lie
  • Wisdom for foolishness
  • Immortality for mortality
  • Honor for dishonor
  • Devotion for disregard
  • God for gods

These are all very poor replacements. In fact, the exchanges are so dark that they leave us in a state of guilt before God and all creation. Indeed, we all have sinned and fallen short of our intended purpose on this earth.

Guilt and Shame

Our response must not exchange guilt for shame because they are different words:

Guilt is assigned by God so that repentance and reconciliation might happen.

Shame, however, is introduced by us; we are the ones who label ourselves as a bucket of pig slop, not God.

Guilt is a function of the conscience, letting us know when we have said or done something wrong or hurtful; it is specific to a particular action or lack of action.

Shame, however, is a function of the “inner critic.” It interprets bad words or actions as we ourselves being bad, focusing not on actions but on our very personhood in the form of judgmentalism leveled at myself.

Guilt says, “I have done something bad.”

Shame, however, says, “I am bad.”

Guilt serves a redemptive purpose through alerting us that we need to deal with a wrong.

Shame, however, damages our spirits through telling us we are flawed and unworthy of love and connection with others.

Because guilt and shame are not the same, they need to be dealt with in different ways.

Guilt, if not faced and dealt with, becomes gangrene of the soul. Over time it festers and poisons our spirits, leading to significant emotional and sometimes physical problems. Forgiveness (both in apologies and in forgiving oneself) is the primary tool in dealing with guilt.

Shame, however, lives in the shadows and feeds on secrets. If shame persists, we withdraw from others and experience grinding loneliness. Therefore, the path out of shame is to openly name your shame and tell your story – thus taking away shame’s power and giving it back to yourself. Vulnerability is the tool which erases shame.

“Shame, blame, disrespect, betrayal, and the withholding of affection damage the roots from which love grows. Love can only survive these injuries if they are acknowledged and healed.”

Brené Brown

Emotional Creatures

In the absence of light, there is darkness. Purging oneself of belief in God merely means that another god will take her place. Scripture labels this “idolatry.”

What’s more, in the absence of feeling, in the quest to absolve oneself of unwanted emotions, there still remains emotion – because humans are emotional creatures.

People mostly rid themselves of any god concept because of how they feel about it. In fact, we do just about everything in life based on our emotions. This is a good thing, not a bad thing. We get into problems and fuss about emotions mucking up things, only because we never faced those feelings to begin with.

A person will never know God unless they understand this. The worship of God and the practice of Christianity is not only to engage the mind and the spirit, but also the body and the emotions.

Emotions and feelings are not like foreign microbes that enter the body as unwanted interlopers. They didn’t enter humanity as part of the world’s curse, after Adam and Eve’s fall into disobedience. No!

Rather, we are our emotions, just as much as we are our body, mind, and soul. Therefore, every emotion which exists, resides in us, all the time. We cannot purge ourselves of our emotions any more than we can remove the heart, the brain, or the bowels, and then expect to live.

Denying our emotions, suppressing feelings, and leaving them unacknowledged is terribly unhealthy and will slowly kill us – because our emotions are vital to our very existence.

Getting Rid of God

There are millions of spiritually dead zombies walking the earth who have jettisoned God altogether – either deliberately or unwittingly – because they discarded their emotions, long before they exchanged the sacred for the secular.

We all sometimes get physically ill; it’s part of the human condition, and we all understand that. So, we go to bed, or to the doctor, or to the hospital’s emergency department – depending upon the severity of our illness. We even go to a physician when we are healthy, just to get a check-up and make sure everything in the body is working as it should.

We also all get spiritually and emotionally ill; it’s part of the human condition. But we all don’t understand that. So, we soldier on, going about our regular business as if everything is hunky-dory. We don’t attend to our emotional selves. We don’t slow down and address what’s going on, or go to a church, or go to anyone. Instead, we suffer in silence.

Just as it ludicrous to get rid of the body altogether whenever we get a disease, so we must not rid ourselves of God whenever we get spiritually and emotionally sick. We face the illness and deal with it. It might require surgery. Recovery will hurt. That’s all part of facing it.

Ignoring God is about as smart as ignoring a heart attack. It might go away for a short time, but it’ll come back with a vengeance and do you in.

Emotions aren’t to blame when things are rough. Neither is God to blame when bad stuff happens. Both our emotions and God are realities we must deal with.

Just like the force of gravity is always there and needs to be respected (by not simply walking off the roof of your house, believing you don’t need gravity anymore) so the person and the power of God is always here and we absolutely need to come to terms with that reality, instead of walking away.

What will you do?…