Tag: altruism

How Do You Want To Be Remembered?

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality BlogLeave a comment

Someday when I am dead and buried, I would be fine with my gravestone stating, “He was humble and wise.” For I have always sought (however imperfectly) to embrace and live a life characterized by poverty of spirit, largeness of heart, and a sage mind.

Yet, most of all, I’d like to be remembered by the phrase, “He loved God.” The Great Command of Jesus to love God and each other is something I pray and seek in my daily life. And I hope that at the end of my earthly life, the love of God within me has made the world a better place.

In saying this, it means I forsake a lot of other ambitions to be remembered by. I don’t really care if I am remembered for any other virtues or abilities other than love, humility, and wisdom.

For the times that I have unknowingly pursued other things above what is of concern to my Lord Jesus, I admit and renounce those things. Because that is what humility and love does. And it’s the wisest thing a person could do.

That is in direct contrast and opposition to worldly ambitions for wealth and financial resources, power and authority, attention and greatness. Such desires arise from pride, not humility. With arrogance, ignorance and hate are not far behind.

Things like love, humility, wisdom, mercy, gentleness, righteousness, justice, goodness, and a largesse which comes from the heart, not the bank account, are what characterize the kingdom of God, and not the political realms and economic powers of this world.

Such virtue is itself the good life. And it is not out of touch for any of us. For Christ himself repeatedly told and reminded his disciples that the kingdom of God is near, so near as to be within us.

“The time has come, and God’s kingdom is near. Change the way you think and act, and believe the Good News.” (Mark 1:15, God’s Word Translation)

“The Kingdom of God is near you now.” (Luke 10:9, New Living Translation)

And we are told to make God’s kingdom a priority. We are to humble ourselves before God and seek the reign of God and the values of how God operates, rather than putting all our equity into material possessions.

“Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things (material resources) will be given to you as well.” (Matthew 6:33, New International Version)

The super-rich of this world have a super difficult time ever humbling themselves to anyone, including God, because they can so easily rely upon their vast earthly resources.

“Truly I tell you, it will be hard for a rich person to enter the kingdom of heaven. Again I tell you: It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.” (Matthew 19:23-24, New Revised Standard Version)

God’s kingdom is not something that is so far out of touch for us, or way out there somewhere, as if we could not, and therefore need not, pay much attention to it. No, it is much closer than any of us realize.

“People can’t observe the coming of God’s kingdom. They can’t say, ‘Here it is!’ or ‘There it is!’ You see, God’s kingdom is within  you.” (Luke 17:20-21, God’s Word Translation)

You and I have the light within us. For some people (maybe most people) this light has diminished to a tiny little flame or spark. They themselves either cannot or will not perceive there is something right and good that exists down deep in this soul created in the image and likeness of God.

Phrases such as “Let us rely upon our better angels,” and “Get in touch with our nobler instincts,” are more modern ways of expressing that there is inherent worth within us that we can tap into. It doesn’t even take a Christian or a religious person to recognize this reality.

We really do have a higher self, a conscience containing a moral compass, a given benevolent nature, altruistic impulses, and a compassionate side to us. Will we seek this part of ourselves? Will we tap into it? Will we allow it to come out into the world in order to bless it, not curse it?

Yet, as we know all too well, we also a have within us a depraved part which wants to rule over others and acquire as much wealth and power as possible. As with most things, we ourselves are a paradoxical conundrum of competing desires.

How do you want to be remembered? We can pursue the kingdom of God within us, or we can seek the kingdoms of this world outside of us. It’s your choice. But you will need help, if going after such things as humility, wisdom, and love as your way of life – not only help from God, but also help from others.

“Ask, and it will be given to you; search, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened for you. For everyone who asks receives, and everyone who searches finds, and for everyone who knocks, the door will be opened. Is there anyone among you who, if your child asked for bread, would give a stone? Or if the child asked for a fish, would give a snake? If you, then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask him!

“In everything do to others as you would have them do to you, for this is the Law and the Prophets. (Matthew 7:7-12, New Revised Standard Version)

What is true of you, that you would like engraved on your gravestone? How do you want to be remembered? That’s what we need in this world, for this time and for this place.

To Forgive Is Divine (Genesis 50:15-26)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year ALeave a comment
Joseph pardons his brothers, by Bacchiacca (1495-1557) http://www.nationalgallery.org.uk/paintings/NG1219

When Joseph’s brothers realized that their father was now dead, they said, “What if Joseph bears a grudge against us, and wants to pay us back seriously for all of the terrible things we did to him?” So they approached Joseph and said, “Your father gave orders before he died, telling us, ‘This is what you should say to Joseph. “Please, forgive your brothers’ sins and misdeeds, for they did terrible things to you. Now, please forgive the sins of the servants of your father’s God.”’” Joseph wept when they spoke to him.

His brothers wept too, fell down in front of him, and said, “We’re here as your slaves.”

But Joseph said to them, “Don’t be afraid. Am I God? You planned something bad for me, but God produced something good from it, in order to save the lives of many people, just as he’s doing today. Now, don’t be afraid. I will take care of you and your children.” So he put them at ease and spoke reassuringly to them.

Thus Joseph lived in Egypt, he and his father’s household. Joseph lived 110 years and saw Ephraim’s grandchildren. The children of Machir, Manasseh’s son, were also born on Joseph’s knees. Joseph said to his brothers, “I’m about to die. God will certainly take care of you and bring you out of this land to the land he promised to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob.” Joseph made Israel’s sons promise, “When God takes care of you, you must bring up my bones out of here.” Joseph died when he was 110 years old. They embalmed him and placed him in a coffin in Egypt. (Common English Bible)

“All people commit sins and make mistakes. God forgives them, and people are acting in a divine way when they forgive.”

Alexander Pope, “An Essay on Criticism”

If there was anyone who had a supposed right to be bitter and unforgiving, it would be Joseph. His brothers had hated him, left him for dead, sold him into slavery, and lied to their father Jacob about him. For years, Joseph languished in servitude and prison – for no fault of his own.

And yet, Joseph was able to discern that it wasn’t his place to be the judge. At the end of his life, he had the perspective and the insight to understand that all the hardship earlier in his life was noticed by God, and then bent for good and divine purposes in the saving of many lives.

If we can keep in mind that it is God’s business to run the world, and our business to forgive others, then life will go a lot better for everyone.

Many people live discontented lives because they say to themselves, “I will not forget what you did, and I will not forgive.” Persistent thoughts of revenge only serve as a cancer that destroys the mind’s thoughts, erodes the soul, and hinders the heart’s ability to love. 

But people who practice forgiveness are much less likely to be hateful, hostile, and belligerent toward others. They are healthier and happier, and more at peace.

I’ve had many people tell me over the years, “But you don’t know what I’ve been through.” My typical response is, “You don’t know what I’ve been through, either. You may not even believe some of the things I have experienced, and some of the things that have happened to me and were said to me. So, can I tell you what I have done to forgive those who have sinned against me?”

1. When I am trying to forgive someone, I pray for them.

It’s hard to keep resenting someone and wish them ill, whenever you are praying for them on a regular basis. Joseph was the victim of his brothers’ abuse. If there was ever a dysfunctional family to grow up in, it was Joseph’s. Being sold into slavery by your own brothers and being the target of their derision would cause anyone to be upset. But, many years later, Joseph chose to forgive his brothers. He acted with their best interests at mind. He prayed for them and did not actively work against them. What’s more, he saw the hand of God in it all.

2. I write a letter of forgiveness (which I may or may not send).

In the letter I write in full detail how the person hurt me. I leave nothing out. I express exactly how it made me feel, and how it affected my life. Then, I express forgiveness and say that I will not hold the offense over their head. The following is a five-step process for forgiving others using the acrostic REACH:

Recall 

Name the hurt, and name it squarely. Don’t fudge by saying it’s not that bad, or as bad as others have experienced. Call it what it is: deceit, stealing, harassment, assault, abuse, adultery, verbal shaming, murder, etc. 

The Truth and Reconciliation Commission in South Africa after apartheid was based on providing full disclosure of all crimes. Those that stepped forward, giving a complete account of their actions, were offered a full pardon. 

Archbishop Desmond Tutu, who led the commission, was most struck by how many people wanted to hear what had happened to their loved ones from the perpetrators themselves so that they could know whom to forgive. Methinks we have much to learn from our African brothers and sisters.

Empathize

Try and see the offense from the other person’s perspective. Attempt to put yourself in the other’s shoes. This does not mean we paper over the offense; it just means we don’t demonize another as a monster. That only feeds and fuels our own lack of forgiveness. When we view others as non-human, then we feel no responsibility to forgive.

Altruistic

Choose to do the right thing and treat the other person well, not necessarily because they deserve it, but because it is within your control to extend grace. Again, this is what Joseph chose to do with his brothers. He gave them words of assurance, and promises of taking care of them and their children.

Commit

Commit to practicing forgiveness. Make the decision to do it. Don’t wait too long for your feelings to catch up to you.  

Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.

The Apostle Paul (Colossians 3:13, NIV)

Hold

Hold on to your forgiveness. Just because you make the decision to forgive does not mean you’ll never have to do it again. Once you have forgiven, let it be a stake in the ground in which you look back to it again and again, saying, “I forgave him/her, and I will not let the enemy of my soul keep trying to make me bitter about it all over again.” 

One of the reasons we repeat the Lord’s Prayer Sunday after Sunday in my church is to keep forgiving those who have sinned against us.

3. I talk to a trusted friend, mentor, or counselor about my effort to forgive.

Many people get stuck and have an inability to forgive because they don’t seek a wise person to help them walk through the process of forgiving. 

The easy path is to complain about the offense to someone we know who will react with the same level of disgust and spirit of revenge that we ourselves have in our hearts. But that only reinforces the bitterness. We must have someone who can offer us what we need to hear, and not only what we want to hear.

Forgiveness is at the heart of the gospel, and, so, ought to be at the core of a healthy spiritual life. It is always open season on offering grace, forgiveness, and reconciliation. To see all of life from a divine perspective is to forgive.

Pray like this:

Our Father who is in heaven,

uphold the holiness of your name.

Bring in your kingdom

so that your will is done on earth as it’s done in heaven.

Give us the bread we need for today.

Forgive us for the ways we have wronged you,

just as we also forgive those who have wronged us.

And don’t lead us into temptation,

but rescue us from the evil one.

If you forgive others their sins, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you don’t forgive others, neither will your Father forgive your sins. (Matthew 6:9-15, CEB)

Your People Will Be My People (Ruth 1:6-18)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year ALeave a comment
Naomi and Ruth by Chana Helen Rosenberg, 2017

When Naomi heard in Moab that the Lord had come to the aid of his people by providing food for them, she and her daughters-in-law prepared to return home from there. With her two daughters-in-law she left the place where she had been living and set out on the road that would take them back to the land of Judah.

Then Naomi said to her two daughters-in-law, “Go back, each of you, to your mother’s home. May the Lord show you kindness, as you have shown kindness to your dead husbands and to me. May the Lord grant that each of you will find rest in the home of another husband.”

Then she kissed them goodbye, and they wept aloud and said to her, “We will go back with you to your people.”

But Naomi said, “Return home, my daughters. Why would you come with me? Am I going to have any more sons, who could become your husbands? Return home, my daughters; I am too old to have another husband. Even if I thought there was still hope for me—even if I had a husband tonight and then gave birth to sons—would you wait until they grew up? Would you remain unmarried for them? No, my daughters. It is more bitter for me than for you, because the Lord’s hand has turned against me!”

At this they wept aloud again. Then Orpah kissed her mother-in-law goodbye, but Ruth clung to her.

“Look,” said Naomi, “your sister-in-law is going back to her people and her gods. Go back with her.”

But Ruth replied, “Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if even death separates you and me.” When Naomi realized that Ruth was determined to go with her, she stopped urging her. (New International Version)

Every time I read this account of Naomi and her daughters-in-law I’m reminded of my Dad because this was his favorite Old Testament story.

Dad was a lifelong farmer, and so, always related to the agrarian society of ancient Israel. But what really resonated for him in Scripture was Ruth’s response to her mother-in-law: “Your people are my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried.”

My father did not want to be a farmer. He wanted to go to college and become an engineer. In fact, without my grandfather’s knowledge, he was accepted to a university and secured an on-campus job. Yet, when Grandpa found out, he was less than pleased because Dad was needed on the farm during the depression era.

So, Dad, although he could have went to college, decided to stay on the farm. And the reason he decided to do so was not because he got his arm twisted, but because of the story of Ruth. He made the decision to stick with farming and never looked back. My Dad died ten years ago and is buried in the same cemetery as his father.

Ruth and Naomi by He Qi, 2001

The biblical character of Ruth is a solid example of one who was cognizant that she was part of a larger whole – that, although she was indeed an individual with personal choices, the decisions she made impact a much wider community. I believe Ruth discerned that the Israelite community understood this truth, and she wanted to be a part of it.

It is rare, in this age of extreme individualism, that people willingly give themselves to do what is best for the group, the family, the neighborhood, the faith community, the nation, and the world. There is a tendency to view things very narrowly in terms of what’s in it for me and ignore the rest.

So, I invite you to consider becoming ever more aware and connected to the communities around you. Discover the issues, problems, joys, sorrows, celebrations, and challenges they hold. And give yourself to the great struggles of that place. Jesus said:

If any of you want to be my followers, you must forget about yourself. You must take up your cross and follow me. If you want to save your life, you will destroy it. But if you give up your life for me, you will find it. (Matthew 16:24-25, CEV)

The One who is concerned to save the entire world only tolerates disciples who share his care for the entire human family.

Therefore, we ought neither to participate in nor support causes, activities, or speech that is harmful to others. Instead, we should find ways of using our particular gifts and abilities to serve the common good of all persons. We need more commitment and love, and a lot less anger, divisiveness, and hatred.

Grace and humility will always serve us, and others, very well. Judgment and pride, not so much.

Tell them to do good, to be rich in the good things they do, to be generous, and to share with others. (1 Timothy 6:18, CEB)

How, then, shall we live?

Your people will be my people.

Can you imagine a world in which all persons ascribe to this?

May it be so, to the glory of God.

We pray to you, Lord God, for all people everywhere:

For all people in their daily life and work;
For our families, friends, and neighbors, and for those who are alone.

For our community, the nation, and the world;
For all who work for justice, freedom, and peace.

For the just and proper use of your creation;
For the victims of hunger, fear, injustice, and oppression.

For all who are in danger, sorrow, or any kind of trouble;
For those who minister to the sick, the friendless, and the needy.

For the peace and unity of the Church;
For all who proclaim and seek the Truth.

Hear us, Lord; For your mercy is great. Amen.

John 13:1-17 – Stinky Feet Love

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment
Jesus washing the feet of the disciples, by Leszek Forczek

Now before the festival of the Passover, Jesus knew that his hour had come to depart from this world and go to the Father. Having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end. The devil had already put it into the heart of Judas son of Simon Iscariot to betray him. And during supper Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into his hands, and that he had come from God and was going to God, got up from the table, took off his outer robe, and tied a towel around himself. Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and to wipe them with the towel that was tied around him. He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, “Lord, are you going to wash my feet?” Jesus answered, “You do not know now what I am doing, but later you will understand.” Peter said to him, “You will never wash my feet.” Jesus answered, “Unless I wash you, you have no share with me.” Simon Peter said to him, “Lord, not my feet only but also my hands and my head!” Jesus said to him, “One who has bathed does not need to wash, except for the feet, but is entirely clean. And you are clean, though not all of you.” For he knew who was to betray him; for this reason, he said, “Not all of you are clean.”

After he had washed their feet, had put on his robe, and had returned to the table, he said to them, “Do you know what I have done to you? You call me Teacher and Lord—and you are right, for that is what I am. So, if I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. For I have set you an example, that you also should do as I have done to you. Very truly, I tell you, servants are not greater than their master, nor are messengers greater than the one who sent them. If you know these things, you are blessed if you do them. (New Revised Standard Version)

One of the reasons I like Jesus so much is that he loves me as I am, and not as I should be. Jesus loves me even with my dirty stinky feet, my herky-jerky commitment to him, and my pre-meditated sin. Jesus loved even Judas and washed his feet. Jesus serves people because they need his love, and not so that they will love him back.

I read about a man who lives in Paris. His wife has Alzheimer’s. He was an important businessman, and his life was filled with busyness. Yet, he said when his wife fell sick, “I just couldn’t put her into an institution, so I kept her. I fed her. I bathed her. Through the experience of serving my wife every day, I have changed. I have become more human. The other night, in the middle of the night, my wife woke me up. She came out of the fog for a moment, and she said, ‘Darling, I just want to say thank you for all you are doing for me.’ Then she fell back into the fog. I wept for hours to know this grace.”

Sometimes Christ calls me to love people who either cannot or will not love me in return. They live in the fog of some sort of disability, depression, poverty, or common spiritual blindness. As I serve them, I may only receive brief glimpses of gratitude. Just as Jesus loves me within my own spiritual confusion, so I desire to continue loving others as they walk through whatever fog they are in.

Lord willing, my life will be useful through my words and my witness. If God desires, my life will bear fruit through my prayers, my service, and my love. Yet, the usefulness of my life is God’s concern, not mine; it would be indecent of me to worry about that. I simply desire follow my Lord’s example.

Neither many Christians nor churches wash feet anymore. So, the following is today’s Gospel lesson put in a slightly different context:

It was just before the biggest and most important feast of the year, Passover. Jesus knew that it was finally the time for him to face the cross and die for the world’s sins. Having spent the past three years loving his followers, he now wanted to leave them with a clear demonstration of his love that they would never forget.

The evening meal was being served, and the devil had already gotten a hold of Judas Iscariot to betray Jesus to those who wanted him dead and gone. But it was all according to plan. Jesus knew that his heavenly Father had given him all authority because he was his Son, and he was ready to do what needed to be done to secure salvation and return to his rightful place at his Father’s right hand.  So, Jesus got up from the meal, rolled up his sleeves, put an apron on, and ran a sink full of hot water.  Jesus told the servants to take the night off, and he began taking the dishes from the dinner table and started washing them, taking care to do all that waiters and dishwashers would do.

When Jesus came to take care of Simon Peter’s dishes and serve him dessert and coffee, Peter said to him, “Lord, are you going to serve me?” Jesus replied, “I know you do not understand why I am doing this since it seems like something that is beneath me to do, but later you will look back on this night and understand completely what I am doing.”

“No,” said Peter, “this is not right – you are the Master, and this is not what a well-respected rabbi does – you are only disrespecting yourself and making us all look foolish. You are not going to take my dishes and wash them.”

Jesus answered, “Unless I wash these dishes and serve you, you are not going to be able to follow me anymore and you will have no part of what I am doing in this world.”

“Well, then, Lord,” Simon Peter replied, “if that is the way it really is, then don’t just wash the dishes – come on over to my place and clean out the fridge and scrub the kitchen floor!”

Jesus answered, “A person who has had a decent meal needs only to wash the dishes so that he can enjoy the freedom of hospitable relationships with me and those around him.  And all of you here have had a decent meal, though not every one of you.”  For Jesus knew that Judas was only picking at his food in anticipation of betraying him.

When Jesus was all done washing the dishes and serving his disciples, he took his apron off, rolled his sleeves back down, and returned to the table.  He looked them all squarely in the eye and said, “Do you understand what I just did for you?  You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Master,’ and rightly so, for that is exactly what I am.  So, now that I, your Master, and your Teacher have washed your dishes, you also should wash one another’s dishes.  I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.  I am telling you the plain truth that no follower is greater than the one he follows, nor is a preacher greater than the one he preaches about.  Now that you know that it is your task in this life to provide humble loving service, you will have God’s stamp of approval on your life if you quit thinking about how to possess and use power for your own purposes and start thinking about how to use the authority I am giving you to love other people into the kingdom of God.

Loving Lord Jesus, how shocking it was for your disciples to be served by you in such a humble manner.  But I cannot be spiritually cleansed unless I allow you to love me in an almost embarrassing fashion.  Help me not to be so proud that I neither refuse your humble loving service toward me, nor neglect to offer that same kind of service to others.  May love be the word, the idea, and the action that governs my every motivation and movement in your most gracious Name, I pray.  Amen.