Tag: acceptance

The Almighty Has Dealt Bitterly with Me (Ruth 1:18-22)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment
Statue of Ruth and Naomi, by Leonard Baskin (1922-2000)

When Naomi saw that she was determined to go with her, she said no more to her.

So the two of them went on until they came to Bethlehem. When they came to Bethlehem, the whole town was stirred because of them, and the women said, “Is this Naomi?” She said to them,

“Call me no longer Naomi;
    call me Mara,
    for the Almighty has dealt bitterly with me.
I went away full,
    but the Lord has brought me back empty;
why call me Naomi
    when the Lord has dealt harshly with me
    and the Almighty has brought calamity upon me?”

So Naomi returned together with Ruth the Moabite, her daughter-in-law, who came back with her from the country of Moab. They came to Bethlehem at the beginning of the barley harvest. (New Revised Standard Version)

A famine in Judah had brought Naomi and her husband Elimelech to the country of Moab. While there, they had two sons who eventually married two Moabite women: Orpah and Ruth. Over time, each of the husbands died, leaving Naomi and her two daughters-in-law as widows.

Naomi heard that things were finally better in her native Judah. So, she decided to go there, alone. Naomi encouraged her daughters-in-law to remain with their own people and remarry. Orpah did so. Ruth, however, wasn’t having it.

Ruth was determined to stay with her mother-in-law – which meant that she would enter Judah as a foreigner. Despite Naomi’s insistence that Ruth do what is best for herself, Ruth stuck with Naomi.

Once they arrived, the people of Naomi’s hometown were surprised to see the two of them. Naomi was not shy about communicating her bitterness in losing a husband and two sons. She commented that God had turned against her and made her life hard and bitter.

In saying that the Lord had emptied her and brought calamity, Naomi was not speaking against God. Rather, Naomi was expressing some significant theology that has become lost to many modern day Christians around the globe.

Ruth and Naomi, by Morris Nathanson (1927-2022)

I believe that Ruth was not expressing something malevolent about God, but rather made a statement of faithful recognition, not unlike what Job had to say when he lost his family and his health:

“Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return there; the Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” (Job 1:21, NRSV)

No one can escape the dark side of life. Yet, we can deal with that darkness intelligently. It is most necessary to be aware that light creates a shadow that was not there before. The bigger and brighter the light, the bigger and darker the shadow.

There is a centuries old idiom which says, “You can’t have your cake, and eat it, too!” This is a proverbial way of saying that we cannot expect everything to always be good in this life; we must also accept that we cannot always have our way, and that we will go without, experiencing loss.

Whether we want to acknowledge it, or not, an integral part of life is receiving some bad things from God. The Lord does not just go around dispensing everyone’s wishes and making everything a utopia of unicorns and butterflies.

God is most certainly benevolent; yet God also brings darkness to people. We cannot have the Light of the world without experiencing the world’s darkness. Another way of stating this is that a very big God creates quite a large shadow.

In Christianity, the predominant symbol is the cross. The Cross of Christ is both light and dark. Christians may reflexively associate the cross with salvation from sin, while forgetting that the cross is an instrument of torture and death, a tool of execution, like an electric chair.

We must honor the axis crossing at the center of the cross. It is the place of equilibrium, the place of wholeness, where we have the opportunity of integrating all of that unwanted grief and loss into our lives. Failing to do this, let alone neglecting to acknowledge the shadowy places of our hearts, brings harm and hurt to ourselves and to the world.

Naomi acknowledged the shadow. She accepted the darkness, which enabled her to return to her homeland of Judah, the very place where the God of light and dark is worshiped.

I’m not talking about the sort of darkness that is malevolent and mean-spirited, the darkness which comes from Satan. I’m talking about the darkness which weans us away from all things and the ways that hinder us from knowing God.

This is what St. John of the Cross was referring to in naming the dark night of the soul. In our quest to experience union with God, we journey through the darkness, and learn that purification isn’t simply putting something impure away. Purity of heart comes through joining with the God who is pure love itself.

“In the dark night of the soul, bright flows the river of God.”

St. John of the Cross

God loves us so much as to be nailed to a cross and suffer darkness. The Christian is to take up their cross and follow Jesus. That is, we embrace the darkness with an honest engagement of God and God’s world, and through a vulnerable assessment of our own shadow.

For if we fail to acknowledge our shadow, we shall fail to be in union with God.

Not only do many people disown the parts of themselves they don’t like, but they do the same with God – thus making God into their own image of how God should be, instead of taking God as God is.

If you have ears to hear, take this to heart: To accept and honor your own shadow is a profound and necessary spiritual discipline. By “shadow” I mean all of the characteristics of myself that I withhold from others, so that they will only see what I want them to see.

We often put a false self out into the world, for others to see. It is a sort of psychological clothing we wear, much as we have actual clothing. Whether the clothes are real or metaphorical, we dress ourselves in the particular way we want to be seen.

Naomi was a true Israelite, showing her honest true self. There was no separation or division between the inner self and the self she presented to others.

I tend to think that Naomi knew something about God that many don’t know today – and was therefore able to be faithful to both her people and her God.

It is no wonder, then, that Ruth wanted to remain with her mother-in-law Naomi, who was a real person acknowledging the real God.

Almighty God and Father, maker of heaven and earth, of all that is seen and unseen: You are the God of light who illumines our way. And You are the God of darkness who is shadowed in mystery. In knowing You, may I know myself; and in knowing myself, may I more fully know You. Amen.

You Can’t Leverage a Leviathan (Job 41:1-11)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment

“Can you draw out Leviathan with a fishhook
    or press down its tongue with a cord?
Can you put a rope in its nose
    or pierce its jaw with a hook?
Will it make many supplications to you?
    Will it speak soft words to you?
Will it make a covenant with you
    to be taken as your servant forever?
Will you play with it as with a bird
    or put it on a leash for your young women?
Will traders bargain over it?
    Will they divide it up among the merchants?
Can you fill its skin with harpoons
    or its head with fishing spears?
Lay hands on it;
    think of the battle; you will not do it again!
Any hope of capturing it will be disappointed;
    one is overwhelmed even at the sight of it.
No one is so fierce as to dare to stir it up.
    Who can stand before it?
Who can confront it and be safe?
    —under the whole heaven, who?” (New Revised Standard Version)

Just as “Behemoth” is an English transliteration of the Hebrew word (Job 40:15), so is the word “Leviathan” (לִוְיָתָן). The reason for merely transliterating the words is that we don’t really know what sort of creatures they are with any certainty.

Yet, what we do know, is that both of them are strong and ferocious creatures, described by God as beyond the control of humans. They cannot be domesticated, or serve as pets. That’s because no human could ever hunt or capture one of them. Just to look at a Leviathan would cause a person to flee in fear.

The biblical character of Job had been through a lot. Back in the beginning of the Book of Job, he is described as a man who is upright and blameless. Because of this, Satan entered the picture, going to God and accusing Job of only being faithful because he was blessed. So, God allowed Satan to afflict Job, but not kill him.

Yet, Job knew nothing about this celestial conversation. All he knew was that he lost everything and everyone he cared about. On top of it all, Job experienced painful sores which left his health ravaged and his body unable to do much of anything.

Job’s three “friends” came to comfort him. But they did just the opposite by arguing with him and accusing him of secret sinning. All Job wanted was some vindication, some answers to his questions, and some sort of sense to all the senseless suffering.

After long speeches of both Job and his companions, God’s agonizing silence was finally broken. For several chapters (Job 38-41) God gives no answers, but instead, asks his own questions. The gist of God’s confrontational response comes down to this:

You are wondering about things that are way above your ability to know and understand. But what you need to know is that life consists in relationships, in dialogue and interaction with me, and especially with honesty and vulnerability which goes along with those relations.

Life cannot be boiled down to a nice, neat system of good people getting good stuff, and bad people getting bad stuff. Yell at me, and rage at me, if you must. Then you will be honest, real, and relating to me. But I have no tolerance for anyone who tries to be Me, and thinks they know how things actually are, and how they work.

There is no “The Universe For Dummies” by God on the way things operate in the universe. That’s because it cannot be dumbed-down enough for any human to grasp. All we have is relational interaction and connection.

We can’t even figure out what in the world creatures like Behemoth and Leviathan are, let alone understand how to deal with them. Methinks that despair has a much more prominent place for us humans than we realize. But that is a bigger discussion than Behemoth, and so, is for another time.

It could be that God talking of Leviathan – this big uncontrollable and unpredictable creature – is one way of helping us come to grips with our divine/human relationship.

You and I have absolutely no control over God. It’s not remotely possible, at all. And if nobody can domesticate, let alone capture, a Leviathan, then there is no possibility of ever using God as a personal pet for our own purposes.

Far too many of us humans, demand God to show up and explain himself; or we do all sorts of genuflections and pray volumes of words to try and leverage God into answering us and giving us what we want. But there is no leveraging a Leviathan.

Precious few persons on this earth simply let God be God; and choose to focus on being a real, vulnerable human who needs and wants God. Such persons do not try and capture God, because they have already been captured by God.

We are all at the mercy of God, and in no way can manipulate or cajole God toward our agenda for how we think things ought to go. We might as well try and catch a Leviathan.

Humanity does not hold onto God; God holds onto us. God is not obliged to serve us and do our bidding; but we are very much obliged to God in service and fidelity.

God, I believe, rightly seems perturbed by all of longwinded speeches, only because he was being treated as some sort of divine vending machine who dispenses the proper candy bar with an obligatory monetary oblation.

Do we actually believe that we can do a sort of spiritual credit card slide, and get a belly full of goodies? If you want good from God, then do good and be a good person, right?…

Um, no. Frankly, that kind of spirituality irks God. Good people sometimes get bad stuff. And that reality bothers some of us humans to no end.

There is a reason for all that occurs, but it’s way above our human pay grade to know and understand what it’s really all about. So, treat God as God, as the Sovereign of the universe, as the Holy One whom we must relate to in truth, honesty, realness, and vulnerability.

This is another day, O Lord. I don’t really know what it will bring forth. Regardless, make me ready for whatever this day may be. If I am to stand up, help me to stand bravely. If I am to sit still, help me to sit quietly. If I am to lie low, help me to do it patiently. And if I am to do nothing, let me do it gallantly. Make these words more than words, and please give me the Spirit of Jesus. Amen.

There Is a Behemoth In the Room (Job 40:1-24)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment

And the Lord said to Job:

“Shall a faultfinder contend with the Almighty?
    Anyone who argues with God must respond.”

Then Job answered the Lord:

“See, I am of small account; what shall I answer you?
    I lay my hand on my mouth.
I have spoken once, and I will not answer,
    twice but will proceed no further.”

Then the Lord answered Job out of the whirlwind:

“Gird up your loins like a man;
    I will question you, and you declare to me.
Will you even put me in the wrong?
    Will you condemn me that you may be justified?
Have you an arm like God,
    and can you thunder with a voice like his?

“Deck yourself with majesty and dignity;
    clothe yourself with glory and splendor.
Pour out the overflowing of your anger,
    and look on all who are proud and humble them.
Look on all who are proud and bring them low;
    tread down the wicked where they stand.
Hide them all in the dust together;
    bind their faces in the world below.
Then I will also acknowledge to you
    that your own right hand can give you victory.

“Look at Behemoth,
    which I made just as I made you;
    it eats grass like an ox.
Its strength is in its loins
    and its power in the muscles of its belly.
It makes its tail stiff like a cedar;
    the sinews of its thighs are knit together.
Its bones are tubes of bronze,
    its limbs like bars of iron.

“It is the first of the great acts of God;
    only its Maker can approach it with the sword.
For the mountains yield food for it
    where all the wild animals play.
Under the lotus plants it lies,
    in the covert of the reeds and in the marsh.
The lotus trees cover it for shade;
    the willows of the wadi surround it.
Even if the river is turbulent, it is not frightened;
    it is confident though Jordan rushes against its mouth.
Can one take it with hooks
    or pierce its nose with a snare? (New Revised Standard Version)

At various times throughout my life, and the life of my dear family, we have been referred to by others as “the family of Job.” Believe me, it’s not really a moniker you’d like to have.

It can be good to know that there are others who see you and affirm your undeserved suffering. Yet, suffering is not something I have ever asked for or wanted.

Suffering is like an uninvited guest who crashes life’s party. And there is no bouncer I can turn to in order to get this unwanted behemoth out of my life.

Speaking of behemoths, it just so happens that “Behemoth” is mentioned by God in today’s Old Testament lesson.

The word “behemoth” is simply an English transliteration (bəhēmōṯ) of the Hebrew word (בְּהֵמוֹת). This is because nobody really knows what the Behemoth is, or was.

This, however, didn’t stop some English translations from interpreting Behemoth, e.g. “hippopotamus” in the Contemporary English Version; and, the Easy-to-Read Version uses “behemoth” but inserts the footnote that “This might be a hippopotamus, a rhinoceros, or possibly an elephant.”

Whatever Behemoth actually was, it was very big and strong. And the fact that God can have one as a pet is meant to speak of how immense and powerful God is.

A big old Behemoth is something we may be awe-inspired by, or even admire from afar. But I don’t think any of us would want one in our living room, especially if the Behemoth is bigger than the room.

But that’s exactly where I too often find myself. I come home, and there is this great big behemoth that I cannot get around nor ignore. I have to deal with it.

The Behemoth makes me realize that I am rather puny and weak; I am therefore very limited in how I can deal with it. Compared to this Behemoth, I am nothing. My human limitations come annoyingly to the forefront as a pathetic display of ineffectiveness.

And that is precisely what I don’t like. I absolutely despise being limited. I keep holding to the ridiculous notion that in any and every situation, I feel that I should be able to handle it. I should be the smartest person in the room. I ought to be the best person for the job. I should be up to whatever job is in front of me.

I can easily “should” myself to death, believing that because I look like Clark Kent, I am really Superman. But the truth is that I am vulnerable, limited, and don’t have all the answers.

I have no problem whatsoever affirming God’s power, size, and ability. I have plenty of faith to believe that God’s plans and purposes will be accomplished in this world. And I have all kinds of trust that God is good for divine promises made.

But I have some serious problems with my own limitations. I hate having a lack of knowledge, awareness, and strength. I despise not being able to help. I want nothing to do with what my late aged parents described as “being a burden to my family.”

Yet, here I am. A human, with all the weaknesses, limitations, and ignorance that goes with it.

And this is the core of my problem: I cannot help God, be more like Jesus, and have the strength of the Holy Spirit. In other words, I am not God. I’m about as close to being like God as both ends of the universe are.

As big as that huge Behemoth is in my life – which for me, is actually my insipid and frustrating limitations – God is infinitely bigger than the biggest Behemoth there ever was.

It turns out that my not wanting to submit to anything but God, is really a lack of submission to God. The Lord wants to use my wife, my children, my colleagues, my neighbors, and even people I don’t know and/or don’t like to help me in my limitations.

When God shows up, it usually isn’t in a dramatic whirlwind; God typically comes in the form of the person right in front of me.

Almighty God, the Creator and Sustainer of the universe, you have no limits. Yet, I am quite limited. My body cannot do everything. My mind cannot know all things. My ability to feel and express emotion is too often suppressed and purposely limited. And my spirit is too often limited to the three dimensions of my physical existence. Help, Lord; I need you.

May your divine grace and peace surround me and fill me, so that even when I am weak in body, I am strong in faith. Help me to accept my human limitations, as well as help from others; and to embrace and pursue my spiritual possibilities; through Jesus Christ my Lord. Amen.

Nothing Makes Sense (Ecclesiastes 1:1-18)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment
Statue of “The Thinker,” by Auguste Rodin, 1880. Photo by Robert Reynolds.

When the son of David was king in Jerusalem, he was known to be very wise, and he said:

Nothing makes sense!
Everything is nonsense.
    I have seen it all—
    nothing makes sense!
What is there to show
for all of our hard work
    here on this earth?
People come, and people go,
but still the world
    never changes.

The sun comes up,
    the sun goes down;
it hurries right back
    to where it started from.
The wind blows south,
    the wind blows north;
round and round it blows
    over and over again.
All rivers empty into the sea,
    but it never spills over;
one by one the rivers return
    to their source.

All of life is far more boring
    than words could ever say.
Our eyes and our ears
are never satisfied
    with what we see and hear.
Everything that happens
    has happened before;
nothing is new,
    nothing under the sun.
Someone might say,
    “Here is something new!”
But it happened before,
    long before we were born.
No one who lived in the past
    is remembered anymore,
and everyone yet to be born
    will be forgotten too.

I said these things when I lived in Jerusalem as king of Israel. With all my wisdom I tried to understand everything that happens here on earth. And God has made this so hard for us humans to do. I have seen it all, and everything is just as senseless as chasing the wind.

If something is crooked,
    it can’t be made straight;
if something isn’t there,
    it can’t be counted.

I said to myself, “You are by far the wisest person who has ever lived in Jerusalem. You are eager to learn, and you have learned a lot.” Then I decided to find out all I could about wisdom and foolishness. Soon I realized that this too was as senseless as chasing the wind.

The more you know,
    the more you hurt;
the more you understand,
    the more you suffer. (Contemporary English Version)

There’s an awful lot of nonsense in this old world. Arguably, the wisest person who ever lived, King Solomon, said that everything is nonsense, and all things are meaningless.

That’s probably why the Book of Ecclesiastes isn’t at the top of most people’s reading list. Admittedly, in many ways, it’s a depressing read.

Yet, maybe we are being led to consider that it really isn’t our task or purpose to understand everything in this world. After all, if a wise guy like Solomon didn’t make heads nor tails of it all, why in tarnation would you or I try to do so?

This doesn’t mean we don’t understand anything; it just means that we don’t have the ultimate answers on the universe’s workings. And if we try to have perfect knowledge of all things, it will be a fool’s errand. That’s because only God has ultimate understanding and perfect knowledge of everything and everyone.

So then, what do we do? Glad you asked. We accept our limitations, and thereby, it is likely we will gain more understanding than any other way we try.

Meister Eckhart, a medieval Catholic monk, had some sage observations in this short poem:

What is the prayer

of a heart loosed

from all the things

that crowd our lives

and worry our minds

from day to day?

it is coming to that

place within us where

not knowing is the

mark of faith,

not wanting

the work of hope,

and not demanding

the gift of love.

Meister Eckhart talked of acceptance, and letting go of expectations. Learning to allow things to go as they will go, to be okay with not always having to have answers for everything, and refusing to control people and outcomes, is not only the path to acceptance, but is also the way of peace and less anxiety.

Likely, the best that we can do every day is to show up, pay attention, speak the truth in love, and don’t be married to the consequences.

If we can accept our limitations and weaknesses, and embrace the mysteries of life, then a whole world of discernment and wisdom can open to us within the narrow scope of our very mortal lives.

Indeed, we can find a sense of satisfaction and happiness in who we are, and what our place is in this very big world. Yet, this only comes with some significant struggle. Taking the easy path only results in cheap counterfeit contentment.

We will need to become comfortable with mystery and paradox, the knowledge that comes with not knowing, and upside-down theology. These are our keys to the secrets of life.

We must rid ourselves of the idea that Scripture is merely a life map that shows how and where to live. Holy Scripture may be a map, yet, it will point us in directions we may not want to go; and may even tell us to be in two places at once.

To try and make the Bible neat and tidy, with clear answers to modern day questions, is probably why such persons avoid the Book of Ecclesiastes as if it were the plague.

In reality, Ecclesiastes is a book that stands the orderly nature of life on its end. It is the scriptural place where playing by the rules and believing the right things won’t give you the good life you’re searching for.

Eventually, everyone encounters a dark night of the soul in which the death of a loved one, a failed relationship, or the loss of health turns our neatly ordered world upside-down to the point where we don’t recognize who we are, or what the world really is anymore.

These are times when our platitudes of simple faith are impotent to help us. Trust and belief are still important and vital, but they are no longer as understandable and intelligible as they once were.

It is imperative in these times that we doubt and question things; and even question God. A genuine robust faith is one that has been gained by plodding through the muck of anger, and even depression.

Authentic belief is neither cheap nor easy. It engages more than a few mental thoughts; it also goes to the heart and the gut, often with heart-rending emotions and gut-wrenching insights.

The Book of Ecclesiastes is a book for all of us. But it must not be read lightly nor flippantly. It’s contents need to be grappled with. Simply reading the last page of the book and making a faith declaration from that place will not only get you nowhere, it is also potentially damaging.

Only engage this material if you are brave enough, have some chutzpah within you, and are willing to reconsider and perhaps let go of all previous settled ideas about how the world is, or at least, how it should work.

So, if you want some quick answers to life’s meaning and purpose, Ecclesiastes is not the place to look. There are plenty of charlatans out there who would be happy to give you such information.

But if you are searching for something real and authentic, genuine and lasting, then be prepared for a tough, yet fruitful, slog through the “meaningless” meanderings of Ecclesiastes.

Only the courageous and the vulnerable should enter.

O God, I am very sorry that I have sinned against you and for all the wrongs I have done and the good I have not done. Forgive me, and grant me strength and wisdom to amend my life.

I offer you praise and thanksgiving, for creation and all the blessings of this life, for redemption, faith, and love; and for the means of grace and the hope of glory. Amen.