Tag: upset

In Need of Integrity (John 7:19-24)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment
Pharisees, by German painter Karl Schmidt-Rottluff, 1912

It was Moses, wasn’t it, who gave you God’s Law? But none of you are living it. So why are you trying to kill me?”

The crowd said, “You’re crazy! Who’s trying to kill you? You’re demon-possessed.”

Jesus said, “I did one miraculous thing a few months ago, and you’re still standing around getting all upset, wondering what I’m up to. Moses prescribed circumcision—originally it came not from Moses but from his ancestors—and so you circumcise a man, dealing with one part of his body, even if it’s the Sabbath. You do this in order to preserve one item in the Law of Moses. So why are you upset with me because I made a man’s whole body well on the Sabbath? Don’t be hypercritical; use your head—and heart!—to discern what is right, to test what is authentically right.” (The Message)

One of my ardent desires for every person on planet earth, is that they will experience an integration of themselves – that they will know their true selves. And with this awareness, their head, heart, and gut will all be in alignment with each other. Every part of oneself will be acknowledged and work in harmony with the other parts.

I’m talking about wholeness. This is what produces peace, unity, harmony, joy, and strength of spirit. For me, this is the consummate Christian path of discipleship to walk. Jesus has gone before us to clear the way as the pioneer of our salvation. He makes it possible to realize wholeness. Christ has the ability to make us well and to live well. To know Jesus is to be whole.

People who are a bundle of disparate parts – with some of those parts suppressed and unacknowledged – are disturbed. They always seem to be upset with something because the parts of themselves are unable to communicate with each other. With them, there is no peace or wholeness. There is only a myopic view, usually coming from only using the head, only thinking.

But to have thoughts of God, to think about God’s law, and to police how God is thought of and how God’s law is implemented – without the heart or the gut involved – leads to fragmentation and disruption.

To only think, and withhold feelings and intuition, is to sin.

It’s impossible to know God and live God’s commands without involving your entire self. A head without a heart cannot affect humanity with the good that it so desperately needs.

A heart without a head cannot effectively steer the rudder into accomplishing sustained goodness.

And a head and a heart without a gut cannot sense the danger around the corner and loses its good plans and intentions.

Jesus was addressing religious leaders and a large chunk of fragmented people. Many of those persons were unable to discern who Christ actually is, because only the person of integrity and wholeness can do that. So, each one came at Jesus from their own limited place of disintegration. And none of them were able to truly see themselves as they actually are – blind to the reality that they were not keeping God’s law.

Christ and Pharisee, by Russian artist Ivan Filichev, 1993

A fragmented person’s perspective comes at things like this: “I’m obeying the law, although there are some laws I’m not really holding to.” Yet, Jesus understood that to break just one law makes us lawbreakers and in need of healing and wholeness.

Jesus healed a man on the Sabbath. The disintegrated person only saw Jesus working on the Sabbath, which in his head is a no-no. It requires work to heal someone. Therefore, it can wait until tomorrow. Thus, this Jesus fellow sinned against God and disobeyed God’s law. In fact, it only stands to reason that he is in league with a demon, the fragmented person reasons.

But that is to make a poor discernment of the situation. It is, however, only what the fragmented person can do. However, a wise understanding of the man’s healing by Jesus is to observe that Love has come among you – that Sabbath was made for humanity, not humanity for the Sabbath – and that this bringing of wholeness to a person, in restoring not only his health but his ability to connect with society, family, and community, is a knowable good thing. This is most certainly not what any sort of demon would do.

Perhaps one ought to test the spirits and make a good, right, and just discernment. Just maybe, Jesus is the one who can guide us to wholeness, goodness, and integrity. It could be that God is among us, and we didn’t even know it.

Constant criticism of others only deflects from paying attention to our own spirit; and always living in your head keeps you from experiencing the heartache of love.

Merely giving-in to the heart without engaging the head creates a caregiver who has no idea how to care for themselves; eventually they become bitter and gain a critical spirit that no one is caring for them as they care for others.

Blurting-out gut-reaction judgment at another may be truthful, but it will be taken as a severe and discouraging criticism because there was no thought or heart behind it.

There are a lot of upset people in this world. Yet, there are precious few persons with the wholeness to speak from the head, heart, and gut as a unified whole, bringing words and actions of life to others.

The persecuted person is one who has become wonderfully whole, namely because there are far too many fragmented people who view them as a threat, and see them as demonic. Fragmented folk believe they need to put the integrated person in their place, if not done away with altogether.

And that is exactly why Jesus was arrested, tortured, and killed. But fragmentation, disintegration, oppression, and sin do not have the last word. They are not the judge. There is resurrection, new life, and abundant joy because the grace of God in Christ always has the last word.

Christ’s Sermon on the Mount, by Argentine artist Jorge Cocco Santángelo

There’s trouble ahead when you live only for the approval of others, saying what flatters them, doing what indulges them. That’s the way of the fragmented ones; they will find themselves cursed. However, the blessings of God’s rule and reign recognize and affirm the whole person. Jesus said:

You’re blessed when you’re at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule.

You’re blessed when you feel you’ve lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you.

You’re blessed when you’re content with just who you are—no more, no less. That’s the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can’t be bought.

You’re blessed when you’ve worked up a good appetite for God. He’s food and drink in the best meal you’ll ever eat.

You’re blessed when you care. At the moment of being ‘care-full,’ you find yourselves cared for.

You’re blessed when you get your inside world—your mind and heart—put right. Then you can see God in the outside world.

You’re blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of competing or fighting. That’s when you discover who you really are, and your place in God’s family.

You’re blessed when your commitment to God provokes persecution. The persecution drives you even deeper into God’s kingdom. (Matthew 5:3-10, MSG)

May you live into who you are, and avoid who you are not, to the glory of God. Amen.

Learn by Example (1 Corinthians 10:6-13)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment

Now these things occurred as examples to keep us from setting our hearts on evil things as they did. Do not be idolaters, as some of them were; as it is written: “The people sat down to eat and drink and got up to indulge in revelry.” We should not commit sexual immorality, as some of them did—and in one day 23,000 of them died. We should not test Christ, as some of them did—and were killed by snakes. And do not grumble, as some of them did—and were killed by the destroying angel.

These things happened to them as examples and were written down as warnings for us, on whom the culmination of the ages has come. So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall! No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it. (New International Version)

To learn by example is a whole lot better than having to learn something the hard way. One of the lessons of Holy Scripture is that it contains many stories of what not to do, and the consequences of disobedience and experiencing hard things because of anger and stubbornness.

The ancient Israelites in the desert were a group of people who ended up having to learn most things the hard way – simply because they were too stubborn and independent to listen to Moses and obey God’s commands.

Dealing with upset and recalcitrant people is a drag. But there is such a simple solution to it that you might not even believe it. If you learn to practice the one simple solution to dealing with angry, stubborn, and insecure people, your time will open much wider; your own emotions will calm down a great deal; and, you may find the kind of peace and settled conviction that you long for.

You know the type. We have all dealt with them. That chronically upset relative or in-law who demands your time and attention; the insecure co-worker who is constantly chirping about something he does not like in the company; or, the cranky neighbor who only talks to you when something infringes on his person or property.  These scenarios, and many more, you and I either have or will face.

Perhaps the religiously and perpetually upset person or group is the worst – because they hide their fears, anxieties, and insecurities behind a façade of piety and performance.

Let angry people endure the backlash of their own anger; if you try to make it better, you’ll only make it worse. (Proverbs 19:19, MSG)

I once was in a wedding in which a bridesmaid was constantly upset about something all throughout the rehearsal and into the wedding day. It got so bad that, just as we were about to walk down the aisle, she became agitated about something she did not like, and angrily stormed away. 

What would you do in such a situation? What did I do? I did absolutely nothing. I ignored her, told the rest of the wedding party to not follow her, and went about the ceremony. When she saw no one was going to rescue her, she was in line at the last minute to participate. 

If there is a person in your life, or you are in a group, who has frequent emotional meltdowns about most anything, learn the example of Holy Scripture, and hear this wisdom principle that can change your life: 

Angry, stubborn, and insecure people get upset because it works – they get their way. Someone will come to their rescue and fix their anger. But if you will practice the simple solution of letting them just be upset and stew in their own juices without coming to their aid to make it all better, they will eventually stop sucking your time and energy into their angry upset vortex.

The disobedient and upset person is typically one with some sort of entitlement mentality. The bridesmaid didn’t like the way things were being done, and she felt “entitled” to have things go her way. She wasn’t used to accepting “no” like most other people have to do. She believed everyone else ought to adjust for her behavior.

The important point to note here is that it is not your job to fix their emotions; it isn’t your responsibility to smooth everything out so that everyone feels just fine and are calmed down. Instead, it is my job and your job to practice self-control and be responsible for our own emotional well-being. 

If you keep trying to calm an angry person and assuage their emotions to an even keel, you will have to do it again, and again, and again…. Until they figure out their anger doesn’t work, it just does not pay to be upset.

This means that, deep within your soul, you must move from the fear of negative emotions in others to positive possibilities in the right direction. Not everyone is going to like you, no matter how hard you try.

“Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.”

The Apostle Paul (1 Corinthians 11:1, NIV)

Please understand that this does not mean we avoid helping others. It just means we don’t enable their bad behavior by solving their problems for them. We can walk beside them, encourage them, and teach them, but all without doing it for them.

Whenever we think we can handle things on our own, without anyone else’s input through consultation and collaboration, then we are setting up ourselves to have to learn the hard way. So, how will you choose to learn?

O God, by your Spirit, fashion our lives according to the example of your Son, and grant that we may show the power of your love to all among whom we live; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Psalm 73:21-28 – God Is Near

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment

When my thoughts were bitter
    and my feelings were hurt,
I was as stupid as an animal;
    I did not understand you.
Yet I always stay close to you,
    and you hold me by the hand.
You guide me with your instruction
    and at the end you will receive me with honor.
What else do I have in heaven but you?
    Since I have you, what else could I want on earth?
My mind and my body may grow weak,
    but God is my strength;
    he is all I ever need.

Those who abandon you will certainly perish;
    you will destroy those who are unfaithful to you.
But as for me, how wonderful to be near God,
    to find protection with the Sovereign Lord
    and to proclaim all that he has done! (Good News Translation)

Sometimes we put our foot in our mouth. We know how it feels saying rash words that we later regret. And we also know what it feels like to get dumped on by another who has some choice words for us.

The psalmist, Asaph, records an encounter with God. Asaph was upset. He gave God a piece of his mind. Then later, after reflecting on the experience, Asaph admitted that his soul was embittered and let his base nature take over.

The human brain is a complicated organ. We process information in different parts of the brain. The neo-cortex (the rational part of the brain) allows us to engage in logical analysis and complex decision making. 

Another part, the limbic system (sometimes referred to as the “reptilian brain”) processes information very quickly, largely by instinct. When we become scared, surprised, upset, or angry, adrenaline gets pumped into our limbic system so that we can quickly react to the perceived threat, danger, or injustice.

Having our brains flooded with adrenaline when there is real danger is necessary. There are life-threatening circumstances in which we need that quick response. Yet, if our brains remain on high alert and are continually fearful and upset, even when there is no real problem, we don’t calm down, and the result is less than stellar behavior. 

So, what is the answer to this situation? Asaph said God holds his right hand and guides him with wise counsel. Being near to God brings the brain chemistry to appropriate levels so that we can relax and trust.

God is with us always in the person of the Holy Spirit. There is never a time, place, or situation where God is absent. As we learn to rely on God’s presence, and remind ourselves of it on a daily basis, we can restore more rational thoughts to our lives. We can live knowing God is in control and continually vigilant to watch over us.

Gracious God, I have no one in my life like you. My flesh and my heart may fail, my brain might become overwhelmed with irrational fears, but you are my strength and the Rock of my salvation. Thank you for your continual provision and help each day through Jesus Christ, my Lord. Amen.