Tag: suffering

Job 6:1-13 – In the Throes of Suffering

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment
“Oh, that my grief were actually weighed,
all of it were lifted up in scales;
     for now it’s heavier than the sands of the sea;
therefore, my words are rash.
 The Almighty’s arrows are in me;
my spirit drinks their poison,
and God’s terrors are arrayed against me.
 Does a donkey bray over grass
or an ox bellow over its fodder?
 Is tasteless food eaten without salt,
or does egg white have taste?
 I refuse to touch them;
they resemble food for the sick.
 Oh, that what I’ve requested would come
and God grant my hope;
     that God be willing to crush me,
release his hand and cut me off.
 I’d still take comfort,
relieved even though in persistent pain;
for I’ve not denied the words of the holy one.
 What is my strength, that I should hope;
my end, that my life should drag on?
 Is my strength that of rocks,
my flesh bronze?
 I don’t have a helper for myself;
success has been taken from me.” (Common English Bible)
 
            The Old Testament character of Job is famous as the poster boy for suffering, grief, and sorrow.  A divine and devilish drama was taking place behind the curtain of this world of which Job had absolutely no clue about.  All he knew was that he lost everything – his family, his wealth, and his standing before others.  The only thing left was his own life – and he was in such physical pain and emotional hurt that he was ready to die.
            Yet, the greatest pain of all seems to be the silence of God.  Job has no idea, nothing to grab a hold of, no earthly sense of why he was going through such intense and terrible suffering.  His cries, tears, pleas, and expressions of deep hurt seemingly go un-noticed.  Job felt truly alone in his horrible pain of body and spirit.
            This is a very old story, probably having taken place 4,000 years ago.  We’re here all these millennia later knowing the story – why Job suffered, as well as the end of the story.  But Job himself never knew why he suffered, even when God spoke and restored his health and wealth.
            It is so very easy and normal to ask the question, “why?”  When we are in the throes of emotional pain and our prayers seem to bounce off the ceiling, there is only trust left for us.  We do what is unthinkable to others who have never known God – place our complete reliance and hope on the God for whom we know is not really sleeping or off on a vacation.  He’s there.  For whatever reasons which we might never know this side of heaven, God chooses to remain silent.
            The genuineness of faith is not determined by giving the right answers to a theology questionnaire.  Genuine faith is made strong through the trials, sufferings, pain, and lack of understanding in this life.  We all suffer in some way.  How we choose to respond to that suffering, either by cursing God and becoming bitter, or holding to God even tighter and becoming better, is totally up to you and me.

 

God of all creation, you see and survey all your creatures here on this earth.  Sometimes I just don’t understand what in the world you are doing or not doing.  Yet, today I choose to put my faith, hope, and love in you.  I may not know what I’m doing, but you always work to accomplish your good purposes; through Jesus Christ, my Savior, along with the Holy Spirit.  Amen.

Aliens and Strangers

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Exploring Church Ministry BlogLeave a comment
“Beloved, I urge you as aliens and exiles to abstain from the desires of the flesh that wage war against the soul.” –1 Peter 2:11
 
 
 
            It will get better.  God promises it will.  It will not always be this way.  If you and I will not surrender to our desires to get even, fight back, cajole, manipulate, intimidate, talk under our breath to others, and live like the natives – and if you and I continue to do good in both speech and action – then, by God’s grace, we will together bring honor to Jesus Christ on the day he comes again.
            You might think I’m talking about all the worldly people out there who assault the faith.  Yes, they are in the back of my mind.  But, to be honest, I’m thinking primarily about the culture within many (not all or even most) churches today.  Maybe you can relate to these kinds of scenarios:
·         Suzy sits in the back of church, all by herself.  Everyone else seems to have it all together.  But today she is hurting, lonely, and scared.  Suzy wants to live for Jesus, to learn more about him, but no one seems to share her deep passion for this.  She quietly cries, the tears streaming down her face.  She cries alone with no one willing to sit and cry with her.
·         Bill really enjoyed the sermon.  It was as if the pastor were speaking directly to him with solid biblical truth applied with wisdom to his heart.  In the narthex afterward, Bill tries to engage others in discussing what they all just heard.  He only gets blank stares and uncomfortable looks.  The weather, sports, and a dose of how politicians aren’t getting it right are the topics of conversation.  No one will talk with Bill about Jesus.
·         Jim has lots of great relationships with people outside of church.  He enjoys talking with them about his faith because its just a natural point of conversation for him.  Jim loves Jesus, and he wants others to know him, too.  Inside the church, Jim feels like others look at him like he’s weird.  No one seems to share his passion to share Jesus with others.
These, and many more real examples just like them, can be found every Sunday.  Suzy, Bill, and Jim all feel like aliens and strangers in the foreign land of church.  Its tempting to either get angry, or depressed, or just quietly leave, never to return to the awkward place that feels more like a country club for insiders than a church full of broken people in need of the grace and healing ministry of Jesus in their lives.
            The Apostle Peter, writing all those centuries ago, did not tell his readers and listeners that it will all be okay.  On the contrary, he promised them that suffering is a reality.  The point for Peter is whether we suffer as Christians, or as like any garden variety worldly person who doesn’t know Jesus.  It’s one thing to suffer for you own bad decisions, and its another thing to suffer for being a Christian.
            The good news is that Jesus knows what you are going through.  He suffered here on earth.  Now you must be ready to suffer as he did because suffering shows that you belong to him (1 Peter 4:1-2).  Don’t be surprised at how indifferent and even calloused people in the pews can be.  Take heart from this in God’s Word:
“Dear friends, don’t be surprised or shocked that you are going through testing that is like walking through fire. Be glad for the chance to suffer as Christ suffered. It will prepare you for even greater happiness when he makes his glorious return.  Count it a blessing when you suffer for being a Christian. This shows that God’s glorious Spirit is with you. But you deserve to suffer if you are a murderer, a thief, a crook, or a busybody. Don’t be ashamed to suffer for being a Christian. Praise God that you belong to him.” (1 Peter 4:12-16, CEV)
 
I can’t even begin to tell you, my dear friends, how many hurting people I’ve dealt with who have left the church; and, the many folks currently within churches who feel lonely, isolated, and don’t know what to do because they have a sincere passion for Jesus, an ardent desire to know God’s Word, and want to fellowship with others around these longings… but have found a cool reception.
Now, here is the punch line, and why I’ve been speaking with you about the condition of so many congregations today and the hurting people who love Jesus within them:
“God has already begun judging his own people. And if his judgment begins with us, imagine how terrible it will be for those who refuse to obey his message.” (1 Peter 4:17)
 
            I want you to know that you are not alone.  God has chosen and reserved a great number of passionate believers.  You are not Elijah, all by yourself in the cave.  You are not Stephen, the singular saint who stood in front of his own people and was stoned.  You are, however, a precious stone in the building which God is erecting with Christ as the cornerstone. (1 Peter 2:4-8)
            I’m not here to tell you what to do in or with your church.  I am here to communicate grace, mercy, and peace to you in your sincere desire to honor and please Jesus in everything you say and do.  Peter is one of the great witnesses watching over you and cheering you on.

 

            Blessings to you, and may God fulfill every good desire in your heart through Jesus Christ in the power of the Holy Spirit.  Amen.

The Suffering of Christmas

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality BlogLeave a comment

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Christmas:  a time for joy and a time for cheer…  But, unfortunately, it is also a time of profound loneliness and a yearning of days gone by for many people.  A few years back, I received a call on Christmas Day.  One of my parishioners was stretching out to put the angel on top of the family Christmas tree, and fell over dead from a heart attack.  The family’s Christmas will never be the same again, a weird mix, a strange amalgam of both happiness and heartache.  Tragedy that occurs around the holidays makes all future holidays awkward and different.

I have also known folks who were expecting a juicy Christmas bonus, finding instead a pink slip and a surprise lay-off from their job.  Children of divorce probably know the strangeness of the holiday the most, being shuttled here and there obtaining more gifts than they need but more bitterness than they want.  For every one of us who look forward to Christmas Day, there is another who dreads facing another season with unpleasant memories of what happened and what could have been….

Whether Christmas is chiefly joyous for one or sorrowful for another, the bald fact of the matter is that we all suffer in some way.  Let me offer a definition/description of suffering for you to ponder:

Suffering occurs when someone or some circumstance acts against your will and damages either your body, mind, soul, spirit, or all/part of them, creating the great need for healing.

Suffering creates a portal, an opening to either love or hate.  It brings us to the point of decision:  We did not choose suffering; it chose us.  But the choice for healing is very much in our control.  Suffering is an event, maybe even extended over time, which will make us either bitter, or better – it’s your choice.

There are numerous people who will offer you a cup of bitterness, the sour wine vinegar which will dull the pain.  Jesus had such an offer while he hung on the cross, and he refused it.  Nothing was going to stand in the way of his full faculties experiencing the vicarious suffering for our sins.  Dulling the pain doesn’t bring healing; it only makes us forget for a time and just prolongs actual healing.

Instead, the wise choice is to take charge of your life and choose the hard path of healing.  There is a world of difference between the pain that is forced upon us, and the pain which we choose so that we become better and healthy.  The pain of violation must be followed with the pain of healing.

A major way you know your choice of healing is happening is when your heart and life open-up to love, when the shape of grace begins to mold your soul and brings a reception to people who benevolently wait to help with kind words and ways.  Your sight becomes different.  The world becomes brighter.  Decisions are motivated more by love than by protection.  There is the willingness to persevere and patiently complete the process of healing and see it through to a new maturity.  You cease trying to manipulate others and focus more on your own responses to people and situations.  Every day becomes a fresh opportunity to love God by serving others.

Because God is love, and we are created in the image of God, this means we were designed to receive and to give love.  We are love, as well.  To not love is to buck our inherent design from the beginning of time.  We are not just to grit our teeth and force-out loving words and actions; we are to tap into the originality of our souls and be love.  The great task of the Christian life is to awaken to who we really are, to become a whole person, complete and mature.  The only means for this to happen is through the person and work of Jesus Christ.  Jesus, our great professor in the faith, knows that suffering is a teacher.

Far too many persons are perplexed as to why they still struggle and hurt.  They have prayed.  They have read the Bible.  They have tried, time and time again.  Hurt and pain might and is very personal; but healing is communal – it demands more than our own efforts.  Unless we open ourselves to the love of others, and risk putting our souls on the line, we will not realize the peace we long for and the mending of our spirits.

The first step is speaking to someone who is safe, someone for whom you trust, and telling them where you are in your soul – not making yourself look better than you are, and providing a real picture of the state of your life – and, not diminishing the very real abuse which occurred against you by saying others have it harder than you.  In other words, be real.  Humility and honesty will always serve you well.

Yes, it’s Christmas.  How will you choose to deal with it?

Feeling Pain

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog1 Comment

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“There was nothing attractive about him,
nothing to cause us to take a second look.
He was looked down on and passed over,
a man who suffered, who knew pain firsthand.
One look at him and people turned away.
We looked down on him, thought he was scum.
But the fact is, it was our pains he carried—
our disfigurements, all the things wrong with us.
We thought he brought it on himself,
that God was punishing him for his own failures.
But it was our sins that did that to him,
that ripped and tore and crushed him—our sins!
He took the punishment, and that made us whole.
Through his bruises we get healed.” (Isaiah 53:2-5, The Message)

I don’t like pain.  I’m not at all into the feeling of discomfort.  I am told by a few lady friends who have had kidney stones that they are as painful as childbirth, if not worse.  I’ll take their word for it.  I completely believe them because I have had a few stones in my life.  The last time I had one, I vehemently demanded and commanded the emergency staff at the hospital to help me now, and to get me the strongest pain relieving drugs known to humanity now.  I thought I was giving birth to a boulder, and I did not just want pain relief; I needed it.  The pain was acute, and there was no way to let my body relax enough to pass a stone without some significant medicinal intervention.

We often use the word “pain” as if it is a one-size-fits-all for a range of unpleasant experiences.  But the reality is that there is a world of difference between physical pain and emotional pain.  As painful as those kidney stones were, nothing compares to feeling deep emotional pain.  It hurts more than a hundred stones.  It’s a different kind of pain, requiring a different kind of remedy.

When we have physical pain, it is both good and right to work on alleviating the pain through the wonderful drug therapies which exist.  More than once I thanked God for morphine.  But emotional pain is unlike any other kind of hurt.  Whereas immediate pain relief is often necessary to the body in order for it to heal, such is not the case with the soul.  Emotional pain, the kind where our spirits are broken and our souls are damaged, the kind where dreams are shattered and hope drains from the spirit, will not simply go away or ever be alleviated apart from actually feeling it in all of its ugly hurt.

Trying to mask, cover-up, or numb emotional and spiritual pain will not do.  Working harder or faster; imbibing a few strong adult beverages; smoking; overeating; a shopping spree; or pornography are not paths to properly handling the kind of pain that is deep down in the soul.  Binging on sports or Netflix might temporarily distract a person from emotional pain, but it doesn’t make it go away.  In fact, it only exacerbates the future pain.  Try and put a lid on emotional pain and it will only explode its contents on others who don’t deserve the unhealthy barrage of words and behaviors.

Emotional pain must not be ignored, circumvented, or stuffed.  It needs to be faced squarely and deeply felt.  One must resolutely walk into it and through it because it is the only way to effectively deal with it.  Unlike the human body, which is designed to heal itself when given the chance through meds and rest, the soul cannot heal unless it recognizes its hurts, names them, and feels them.  To try and work around it, believe we can simply buck-up and get over it, or wrongheadedly think it only belongs in the past, will not do.

Jesus entered into our pain.  He felt terrible physical pain as well as agonizing emotional pain.  The pain of the entire world was focused on him.  Christ intimately knows our pain first hand.  The path to healing goes through the cross – not avoiding it or going around it, but facing it in all of its foulness, degradation, and pain.

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When my emotional pain seems to go right down into the marrow of my bones to the point where my insides hurt, popping some pills will not help.  I don’t need my pain masked; I need it transformed.  I need to crucify my disappointments, my missed expectations, and my desire for revenge.  I need to nail my perfectionism, my puny attempts at control, and my avoidance of forgiveness to the cross.  And I need to see that by the wounds of Jesus Christ I am healed.  Only through entering into Christ’s pain, and allowing him to enter mine, will I ever experience the long sought healing deep in my soul so that my insides are made right once again.

The emotional kidney stones of my soul are transformed by the rock of my salvation, Jesus Christ.  The great servant of Jesus, the Apostle Paul, said that he has been crucified with Christ and he now no longer lives, but Christ lives within him (Galatians 2:20).  The cross was not simply an historical event occurring two millennia ago; the crucifixion is a past action with the continuing results of genuine deliverance and real healing.  Pain is a gift, and one that must be opened and acknowledged, seen and felt, and transformed.