Directives For the Married and Divorced (1 Corinthians 7:10-16)

On October 8, 2024October 1, 2024 By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment

To the married I give this command—not I but the Lord—that the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does separate, let her remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband) and that the husband should not divorce his wife.

To the rest I say—I and not the Lord—that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. And if any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce the husband.

For the unbelieving husband is made holy through his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy through the brother. Otherwise, your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so; in such a case the brother or sister is not bound. It is to peace that God has called us. Wife, for all you know, you might save your husband. Husband, for all you know, you might save your wife. (New Revised Standard Version)

Having specifically addressed questions about sex; and having directly talked to the Christians in Corinth who were single; the Apostle Paul then turned to the married persons in the church. He gave directions about their concerns of divorce and how to handle a spouse who does not share the believing spouse’s Christian beliefs.

Divorce

Divorce is one of those things that no one plans on happening when they are married; and yet, it happens. The Apostle was realistic about the situation. He upheld the sanctity of marriage, while recognizing that the ideal of two people remaining together and blessing one another doesn’t always happen.

I find it interesting, as well as gracious and understanding, that Paul neither condemns nor denounces the divorced person. He assumes that both spouses have responsibility, and both can take initiative as partners in a marriage.

A Christian married to an unbelieving partner, according to Paul, ought to remain married. As long as the non-believing spouse is willing to remain in such a marriage, then it should continue.

The Apostle’s rationale is that peace, not divorce, needs to be the controlling characteristic of both the marriage and of the Christian life.

“Mixed” Marriage

Furthermore, Paul believed that Christians are not defiled by pagan spouses. This is important when it comes to the children of a Christian and non-Christian marriage. The relationship is sanctified by the presence of both the believing spouse and the Holy Spirit.

In addition, the Apostle saw that the Christian spouse is in a special position for God to work through them to the unbelieving spouse. On this point, Paul is sanguine and optimistic. Instead of worrying about impurity for the Christian, he foresaw an opportunity for purity in the non-Christian.

The Apostle Paul’s realism reminds us that if we are looking for ultimate satisfaction through marriage (or singleness and celibacy) it will never be found.

That’s because, as Christians, contentment and peace comes through giving our lives to serve the Lord Jesus in love. To love another, and offer the gift of self-sacrificial service to them, is the ultimate path to the way of Christ.

In losing our lives, we find them; in being last, we are promoted to first.

Marriage is beautiful. Divorce is ugly. Sometimes, despite a believer’s greatest efforts at being peaceful and loving, a divorce occurs. It takes two to have a marriage. There are times when the believing person must let their spouse go, that is, if that spouse wants to go.

Although divorce can be ugly and sad, full of broken dreams, and littered with missed expectations, it doesn’t need to stay that way. The divorced person, becoming single, now has the opportunity to bring something beautiful out of the brokenness.

Kintsugi

“Kintsugi” is a Japanese term for the art of repairing broken objects. The word literally means to “join with gold.” This art form uses a particular lacquer to reattach broken pieces. Then the newly attached joints are decorated with gold (or silver) powder.

The working idea behind the art of kintsugi is to embrace the flaws and the imperfections. By doing so, the artist can create a beautiful piece of art, stronger than the original.

Applying this to relationships, people no longer have to simply live with the shame of a broken marriage. We can assign value to people who are divorced, and stop trying to hide the relational damage. Through intentional efforts on healing, the scars left behind can truly become a source of beauty – instead of permanent ugliness.

Ikigai

Another Japanese concept which can be relevant for us is “ikigai.” It refers to having a reason for living, a sense of purpose and meaning to life. The idea behind ikigai is to help people find what is truly important to them, and then to live a life full of joy and purpose. Notice the concept is based on that which is internal – fulfillment, satisfaction, joy, and meaning – instead of external factors such as money, fame, power, or position.

Jesus joyfully lived his life on this earth to serve others. He came not to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many (Mark 10:45). If marriage was the ideal for everyone in this world, I’m quite sure Jesus would have modeled that for us by getting married. But he didn’t.

Neither marriage, nor singleness, is what really counts. Faith, expressing itself through love, is what actually counts. (Galatians 5:6)

And when Jesus was broken, the result became the salvation of the world. By his wounds, we are healed. (Isaiah 53:5)

All of this demonstrates for us where and what we are to assign meaning. And just because things don’t work out like we want, and leaves us in a state of brokenness, our lives can be transformed into a beauty beyond what we could have imagined.

This is the strength and ability of Christianity. Methinks we ought to let it have its way in our lives.

Almighty and everlasting God, the One who makes us whole in our brokenness, calls us to deeper faith, and delivers us from all things that hinder our devotion to you: Hear our prayer, Lord, and break open all we hold back from you, so that we may see a vision of your helping and healing presence in our lives and in our world, through Jesus Christ, in the power of the Holy Spirit. Amen.

Live with Integrity (Psalm 26)

On October 4, 2024September 4, 2024 By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment

Vindicate me, O Lord,
    for I have walked in my integrity,
    and I have trusted in the Lord without wavering.
Prove me, O Lord, and try me;
    test my heart and mind.
For your steadfast love is before my eyes,
    and I walk in faithfulness to you.

I do not sit with the worthless,
nor do I consort with hypocrites;
I hate the company of evildoers
and will not sit with the wicked.

I wash my hands in innocence
and go around your altar, O Lord,
singing aloud a song of thanksgiving
and telling all your wondrous deeds.

O Lord, I love the house in which you dwell
    and the place where your glory abides.
Do not sweep me away with sinners
    nor my life with the bloodthirsty,
those in whose hands are evil devices
    and whose right hands are full of bribes.

But as for me, I walk in my integrity;
redeem me and be gracious to me.
My foot stands on level ground;
in the great congregation I will bless the Lord. (New Revised Standard Version)

Those with integrity long for, and pray for, justice and righteousness. They despise evil and desire the community of faith to be full of love.

Today’s psalm, as well as all of the psalms, are solid prayers which are meant to be prayed by any individual person, at any time, in any era. Those desiring the right, the just, and the good, will especially gravitate toward the psalter and prayer.

The faithful seek to live a morally upright life of integrity, peace, and wholeness. Yet, the psalm is also for those who find themselves unfaithful. They can pray and ask God to search their hearts and bring them to innocence. So, no matter who you are, this psalm is for anyone who wants to connect with the Lord

We have the ability to come before God because God encourages it, and makes it possible for us to approach. The Lord isn’t looking for perfection; God wants some honesty and vulnerability, and for us to realize how utterly dependent creatures we are.

The steadfast love of God is everywhere, and the psalmist recognized this. No matter the situation or circumstance, no matter the place or time, God’s love is present. The reason why we can wrap our faith and commitment around God is that God is consistently and constantly loving in everything.

And whenever we discern and know that this world spins on the axis of love, then we have no desire whatsoever to hang out with those who practice wickedness; we want nothing to do with worthless conversations and actions.

When one has been touched by divine love, not only is there a desire to avoid all evil, but there is also a longing to remain in that love, and to have love be the dominant operative force in all things on this earth.

Once we receive love, we want to give love. And having given love, we desire for the entire world to know this love, which is the true ballast and support of the world.

Without love, there is nothing. With love, all things are possible.

The one who loves does not consort with liars or hypocrites, because such persons indulge deception and selfishness, not openness and respect for others. The lover of God and of righteousness is not found in the company of evildoers.

The lovers amongst us are much too busy providing justice and goodness. The haters amongst us just sit around and curmudgeon on about everything that is messed up in this world, and make fun of all the do-gooders who are so enamored with love.

Which group of people would you rather be around? The lovers or the curmudgeons? Would you like to be in the group who acts like they have everything together? Or would you instead like to be in the group who knows how much they are dependent on the force of love, and of the originator of love, the one who is Love incarnate?

I, personally, would rather be in the community of the redeemed, who know they have been rescued by grace and could fall into wickedness if not for God’s sustaining grace. I have no desire to be in community with people who talk one way and live another.

I would like to be in the place characterized by integrity and love, the sort of place described by the Apostle Paul in his letter to the Romans:

Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you….

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.

Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.

Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. (Romans 12:1-3, 9-18, NIV)

The only thing better than blessing the Lord, is blessing the Lord with an entire congregation of redeemed people who possess integrity, righteousness, and sincere love.

The psalmist, along with the Apostle Paul, lets us know that each of us is responsible for our moral and spiritual integrity. We bear the responsibility to give and receive love. Prayer then becomes much easier and desirable whenever we can pray with a longing for God and God’s righteousness. We really can follow God’s ways and serve the common good of all people with some solid integrity.

Our Father in heaven,
Hallowed be Your name.
Your kingdom come.
Your will be done
On earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our debts,
As we forgive our debtors.
And do not lead us into temptation,
But deliver us from the evil one.
For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen. (Matthew 6:9-13, NKJV)

When Things Are Screwy (Esther 3:1-15)

On September 28, 2024August 28, 2024 By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment

After these events, King Xerxes honored Haman son of Hammedatha, the Agagite, elevating him and giving him a seat of honor higher than that of all the other nobles. All the royal officials at the king’s gate knelt down and paid honor to Haman, for the king had commanded this concerning him. But Mordecai would not kneel down or pay him honor.

Then the royal officials at the king’s gate asked Mordecai, “Why do you disobey the king’s command?” Day after day they spoke to him but he refused to comply. Therefore they told Haman about it to see whether Mordecai’s behavior would be tolerated, for he had told them he was a Jew.

When Haman saw that Mordecai would not kneel down or pay him honor, he was enraged. Yet having learned who Mordecai’s people were, he scorned the idea of killing only Mordecai. Instead Haman looked for a way to destroy all Mordecai’s people, the Jews, throughout the whole kingdom of Xerxes.

In the twelfth year of King Xerxes, in the first month, the month of Nisan, the pur (that is, the lot) was cast in the presence of Haman to select a day and month. And the lot fell on^[a] the twelfth month, the month of Adar.

Then Haman said to King Xerxes, “There is a certain people dispersed among the peoples in all the provinces of your kingdom who keep themselves separate. Their customs are different from those of all other people, and they do not obey the king’s laws; it is not in the king’s best interest to tolerate them. If it pleases the king, let a decree be issued to destroy them, and I will give ten thousand talents of silver to the king’s administrators for the royal treasury.”

So the king took his signet ring from his finger and gave it to Haman son of Hammedatha, the Agagite, the enemy of the Jews. “Keep the money,” the king said to Haman, “and do with the people as you please.”

Then on the thirteenth day of the first month the royal secretaries were summoned. They wrote out in the script of each province and in the language of each people all Haman’s orders to the king’s satraps, the governors of the various provinces and the nobles of the various peoples. These were written in the name of King Xerxes himself and sealed with his own ring.

Dispatches were sent by couriers to all the king’s provinces with the order to destroy, kill and annihilate all the Jews—young and old, women and children—on a single day, the thirteenth day of the twelfth month, the month of Adar, and to plunder their goods. A copy of the text of the edict was to be issued as law in every province and made known to the people of every nationality so they would be ready for that day.

The couriers went out, spurred on by the king’s command, and the edict was issued in the citadel of Susa. The king and Haman sat down to drink, but the city of Susa was bewildered. (New International Version)

*A Purim mask of Haman, by Mimi Gross, 1964*

I don’t like arrogant people. I don’t like those who only think of themselves, and expect others to fall in line with them, too! It’s unlikely that an arrogant person would be reading or listening to this, namely because such individuals believe they are above the menial task of reading – unless it gets them more attention and/or power.

I don’t like Haman. The story clearly sets up Haman as the antagonist. He is a number one jerk in the first degree. Having a front row seat to his manipulative ways with the king arouses our sense of justice and injustice. Mordecai was the one person who saw Haman for who he is; so, if Haman couldn’t cajole and control Mordecai, he was determined to do him in, permanently.

It’s interesting that the royal command that people bow to Haman, follows the command that men are the lord of their homes. That doesn’t sound very “complimentary” to me. Haman wanted a strict hierarchical structure, with himself at the top.

It is consistent of the arrogant authoritarian person to not stop with wanting Mordecai out of the way, but also to lay plans for all of Mordecai’s people, the Jews, to be destroyed.

Because of Haman’s arrogant anger, he sought to enlist the king in his sinister plan. Every authoritarian dictator throughout history has scapegoated an entire race of people through rewriting history. Haman spun the Jewish people as a constant historical problem.

Using generalities and twisted truth, Haman depicted Jewish life as one long continuous rebellion against governmental authority. Note that Haman did not produce any hard evidence to his claims.

If this weren’t bad enough, Haman appealed to the king through the promise of financial gain with a plan of ridding the empire of Jews. The king let Haman go ahead with the plan, while keeping his own hands clean from the affair.

Thus, it was decreed that on the thirteenth day of the twelfth month, the people of the empire were to rise up against the Jews and wipe them off the face of the earth. No one was to be spared. And the Jews could be plundered.

So, King Xerxes and Haman went back to drinking and having a good time, neither being aware nor caring that the entire plan is insane and nonsensical – which is why we get the picture of the city’s citizens looking at one another quizzically… “Huh!?”

The story’s stage is set for the protagonist, Esther, to enter. Yet, we need to sit with this terrible situation for a while, and not rush to the conclusion of the narrative. That’s because the ancient Jews had to sit with this for an agonizing stretch of time, knowing that the actual day of their demise was on the calendar.

There would not be the centuries old Jewish celebration of Purim without this tension. Yes, the awful suffering would eventually end in glorious joy. However, there would not be such joy apart from the grinding circumstance of facing extinction.

Another way of putting this: There cannot be a resurrection without a crucifixion. There must be suffering before glory. When things are screwy, we have only our faith to cling to.

The wise person will ponder these things and take them to heart.

Do not forget us, your people, O Lord.
Be present to us in the time of our distress and grant us courage.
Save us by Your power, and come to our aid,
for I am alone and have no one but You on whom to depend. Amen.

Getting Along In a Different Culture (Esther 2:1-23)

On September 27, 2024August 28, 2024 By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment

Later when King Xerxes’ fury had subsided, he remembered Vashti and what she had done and what he had decreed about her. Then the king’s personal attendants proposed, “Let a search be made for beautiful young virgins for the king. Let the king appoint commissioners in every province of his realm to bring all these beautiful young women into the harem at the citadel of Susa. Let them be placed under the care of Hegai, the king’s eunuch, who is in charge of the women; and let beauty treatments be given to them. Then let the young woman who pleases the king be queen instead of Vashti.” This advice appealed to the king, and he followed it.

Now there was in the citadel of Susa a Jew of the tribe of Benjamin, named Mordecai son of Jair, the son of Shimei, the son of Kish, who had been carried into exile from Jerusalem by Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon, among those taken captive with Jehoiachin king of Judah. Mordecai had a cousin named Hadassah, whom he had brought up because she had neither father nor mother. This young woman, who was also known as Esther, had a lovely figure and was beautiful. Mordecai had taken her as his own daughter when her father and mother died.

When the king’s order and edict had been proclaimed, many young women were brought to the citadel of Susa and put under the care of Hegai. Esther also was taken to the king’s palace and entrusted to Hegai, who had charge of the harem. She pleased him and won his favor. Immediately he provided her with her beauty treatments and special food. He assigned to her seven female attendants selected from the king’s palace and moved her and her attendants into the best place in the harem.

Esther had not revealed her nationality and family background, because Mordecai had forbidden her to do so. Every day he walked back and forth near the courtyard of the harem to find out how Esther was and what was happening to her.

Before a young woman’s turn came to go in to King Xerxes, she had to complete twelve months of beauty treatments prescribed for the women, six months with oil of myrrh and six with perfumes and cosmetics. And this is how she would go to the king: Anything she wanted was given her to take with her from the harem to the king’s palace. In the evening she would go there and in the morning return to another part of the harem to the care of Shaashgaz, the king’s eunuch who was in charge of the concubines. She would not return to the king unless he was pleased with her and summoned her by name.

When the turn came for Esther (the young woman Mordecai had adopted, the daughter of his uncle Abihail) to go to the king, she asked for nothing other than what Hegai, the king’s eunuch who was in charge of the harem, suggested. And Esther won the favor of everyone who saw her. She was taken to King Xerxes in the royal residence in the tenth month, the month of Tebeth, in the seventh year of his reign.

Now the king was attracted to Esther more than to any of the other women, and she won his favor and approval more than any of the other virgins. So he set a royal crown on her head and made her queen instead of Vashti. And the king gave a great banquet, Esther’s banquet, for all his nobles and officials. He proclaimed a holiday throughout the provinces and distributed gifts with royal liberality.

When the virgins were assembled a second time, Mordecai was sitting at the king’s gate. But Esther had kept secret her family background and nationality just as Mordecai had told her to do, for she continued to follow Mordecai’s instructions as she had done when he was bringing her up.

During the time Mordecai was sitting at the king’s gate, Bigthana and Teresh, two of the king’s officers who guarded the doorway, became angry and conspired to assassinate King Xerxes. But Mordecai found out about the plot and told Queen Esther, who in turn reported it to the king, giving credit to Mordecai. And when the report was investigated and found to be true, the two officials were impaled on poles. All this was recorded in the book of the annals in the presence of the king. (New International Version)

In 538 B.C.E. King Cyrus issued a decree which allowed exiled Jews to return to Jerusalem. The biblical characters Nehemiah and Ezra were part of the different waves of exiles who went back to their homeland. Yet, there were others who chose to stay in Babylon, in the Persian Empire. They had built lives for themselves, as was encouraged by the prophet Jeremiah:

This is what the Lord Almighty, the God of Israel, says to all those I carried into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: “Build houses and settle down; plant gardens and eat what they produce. Marry and have sons and daughters; find wives for your sons and give your daughters in marriage, so that they too may have sons and daughters. Increase in number there; do not decrease. Also, seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the Lord for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper.” (Jeremiah 29:4-7, NIV)

Being in exile was a huge change. The Jewish exiles were apart from their temple and the Promised Land. They had to make decisions about what this meant for their culture and their religion.

What’s more, they daily faced the reality of being surrounded by beliefs and customs which were not theirs, unlike living in Judah. There was the ever-present temptation of adopting aspects of Persian society which didn’t quite jive with being a Jew.

Many of the Jewish exiles were intent on preserving their Jewish identity as they understood it. But there were others who looked to the future instead of the past in order to live in the present as a Jew in a new time and place.

Mordecai and Esther are examples of an exilic generation who wanted to maintain their identity as Jews, yet assimilated into the Persian culture.

When King Xerxes was looking for a new queen to replace the deposed Vashti, Esther and Mordecai were okay with her being put in the beauty pageant. This was not something a committed and devout Jew would do, considering Jewish law about intermarriage with pagans.

This may be why Mordecai directed Esther not to reveal her Jewishness, to protect her from both Jew and Gentile – as well as to protect the Jewish people themselves. Even among other foreigners and exiles, Jews were (and are today) often misunderstood by dominant cultures.

Jews such as Daniel and his friends were part of the exilic community before Esther. And they took great pains to remain distinct from the wider culture. Yet, Mordecai and Esther did not.

Mordecai was a government official. This was not unusual, since part of the reason for taking captives into Babylon was to glean gifted persons for service. But Esther rising through the beauty contest rankings to become the queen of King Xerxes was next level stuff. One doesn’t get more assimilated than marriage to a king.

Yet, despite the cultural and legal problems from a Jewish standpoint, Esther was put in a place and in a position where she could (and did) rescue her people from genocide and potential annihilation altogether.

Despite any differences Jews themselves had about cultural assimilation, Esther was providentially used to save life.

Under a continually watchful divine eye, the Lord can (and does) use anything and anyone to bring about justice. Circumstances and people change, but God does not. God is always the pioneer and champion of the good.

Maintaining one’s distinctive religious practice in a diverse and changing environment is always a difficult challenge. This is why we must consistently reflect upon and examine our thoughts, intents, emotions, and actions, so that we can remain faithful.

Esther and Mordecai are examples of people who keenly felt the struggle of keeping their identity while trying to survive and thrive in a new setting. And I think they got it right to the best of their ability.

Likewise, we all seek to make decisions, and do the best we can, with the knowledge, wisdom, and discernment we have at the time.

And Providence is there, always in the background, sometimes in the foreground, moving events and people in redemptive ways that are life-giving. That is the faith which all of us need every day.

O God, by whom the meek are guided in judgment, and light rises up in darkness for the godly: Grant us, in all our doubts and decisions, the grace to ask what you would have us to do, so that the Spirit of wisdom may save us from all false choices; and that in your light we may see light, and in your straight path may not stumble. Amen.

Rev. Tim Ehrhardt

Tag: faith