Tag: distress

Feeling the Pain (Job 23:1-9, 16-17)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment

Then Job answered:

“Today also my complaint is bitter;
    his hand is heavy despite my groaning.
Oh, that I knew where I might find him,
    that I might come even to his dwelling!
I would lay my case before him
    and fill my mouth with arguments.
I would learn what he would answer me
    and understand what he would say to me.
Would he contend with me in the greatness of his power?
    No, but he would give heed to me.
There the upright could reason with him,
    and I should be acquitted forever by my judge.

“If I go forward, he is not there;
    or backward, I cannot perceive him;
on the left he hides, and I cannot behold him;
    I turn to the right, but I cannot see him….

God has made my heart faint;
    the Almighty has terrified me.
If only I could vanish in darkness,
    and thick darkness would cover my face. (New Revised Standard Version)

Here is Job, sitting on an ash heap, of all things, and feeling like an ash. His children are gone, all killed by tragic circumstances. His wealth is no more. And now he is lamenting, because he can do nothing else; he has painful nasty sores covering his body that won’t let him do anything.

Job and his friends, by Ilya Repin (1844-1930)

And if that isn’t enough, Job’s “friends” come and end up giving him unhelpful speeches about how all this suffering is really his fault. They reasoned (wrongly) that there must be loads of sin in Job’s life for him to be going through such horror. God is punishing him, they insist.

Job’s companions had initially started out well. For seven days they sat with him in silence (Job 2:13). But then, after a week had passed, they just couldn’t take it anymore. They had the compulsion to speak. And when they opened their mouths, it was merely a bunch of ignorant gobbledygook.  

The friends, the companions, were themselves having an existential theological crisis. Their worldview was being challenged and threatened. So, rather than be open-minded and consider that their views may need to be altered, the friends acted like enemies, accusing Job of sin.

At issue was their clear and clean theology of believing that good guys are blessed with wealth, health, and happiness; and bad guys are cursed with poverty, illness, and misery – like Job.

They could not imagine or entertain the thought that God would let a good person suffer like Job was suffering. Therefore, Job must be bad, and they tried to find that hidden sin within him  to which he must repent of.

Yet, in truth, not all suffering – even terrible grinding suffering – is the result of personal sin or bad decision-making. Sometimes, good people suffer horribly, too.

Times may change, but people throughout the ages don’t. Today, we still think along the same lines as the companions of Job. There is far too much blaming of victims for their victimization; and way too many flippant beliefs which say to others in a terrible situation things like, “You reap what you sow.”

Job, through all of the loss, tragedy, and then suffering from his friends, held onto his integrity. Even though Job knew his situation was undeserved, he did not curse God, nor his friends.

Job made the incredible claim that suffering is not always the result of one’s personal sin – something he himself might not have said before his tragic experiences.

But just because Job did not curse, does not mean he was nice and okay with what unfolded in his life. He wished he was never born. He felt like death would be preferable to living. He contended with God, and longed for justice. His ultimate wish was that God would just speak and say something, anything.

Job was hurting so terribly, that he had bitter words of despair for God. He could make absolutely no sense of what was happening. He could not understand why he was the brunt of so much suffering. It felt like God was attacking him, and he said so.

The silence and absence of God were palpable for Job. He longed to speak with God. And his greatest lament – out of all the reasons to lament – was the horrible feeling of being alone without God’s presence and consolation.

It is interesting that we have no mention in the story about Job’s friends speaking directly to God, or praying to God, or addressing God in any way.

They certainly felt free to tell Job who God is, and how God operates in the world. But there was never any intercession for their friend, and no words of crying out to God on behalf of Job. There was only words of rebuke and chastisement, words of hurt that were as painful as the physical sores on his body

The phrase I hear most often from people speaking to the person in grief and pain is, “You just need to be strong.” And a close second is, “Everything happens for a reason.” The latter phrase is simply unhelpful, and the former phrase is actually hurtful.

It is not a sin to be weak. Just in case you read that sentence too quickly, I will say it again: It. Is. Not. A. Sin. To. Be. Weak!

We understand that when someone breaks a bone, they’ll be limited with weakness for a while. And we make helpful accommodations to that effect. But when someone’s heart is broken, and their life emotionally shredded, we expect them to be strong for everyone else around them.

It may be true that everything happens for a reason, yet most of the time, none of us knows the reason why we’re going through what we’re going through. And we probably won’t, this side of heaven.

If we try to have explanations for everything, then we join the company of Job’s companions who had to try and understand what was happening. And their conclusions were very wrong.

However, there is nothing wrong with weeping with those who weep; and expressing pain, grief, and even anger – both for the one who laments, and those who lament with them.

Pain cannot be relieved unless it is acknowledged, affirmed, and addressed by both the one who suffers and the community who surrounds them.

Where there is lament, there are loud words and expressions of grief. When lament is said to God, then God can hold that person, and rock them in the arms of mercy.

But silence is agonizing. We need friends who will listen and grieve with us. It is vital to have companions who voice to God what we cannot voice in our weakness. All of us, together, must hold onto God, and trust that the Lord hears, and will answer.

As Jesus cried out on the cross, I cry out to you in pain, O God my Creator. Do not forsake me. Grant me relief from this suffering and preserve me in peace; through Jesus Christ my Savior, in the power of the Holy Spirit. Amen.

A Very Heavy Burden (Job 20:1-29)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment
Woman carrying a burden, by Eugène Jules Joseph Laermans, 1916

Then Zophar the Naamathite replied:

“My troubled thoughts prompt me to answer
    because I am greatly disturbed.
I hear a rebuke that dishonors me,
    and my understanding inspires me to reply.

“Surely you know how it has been from of old,
    ever since mankind was placed on the earth,
that the mirth of the wicked is brief,
    the joy of the godless lasts but a moment.
Though the pride of the godless person reaches to the heavens
    and his head touches the clouds,
he will perish forever, like his own dung;
    those who have seen him will say, ‘Where is he?’
Like a dream he flies away, no more to be found,
    banished like a vision of the night.
The eye that saw him will not see him again;
    his place will look on him no more.
His children must make amends to the poor;
    his own hands must give back his wealth.
The youthful vigor that fills his bones
    will lie with him in the dust.

“Though evil is sweet in his mouth
    and he hides it under his tongue,
though he cannot bear to let it go
    and lets it linger in his mouth,
yet his food will turn sour in his stomach;
    it will become the venom of serpents within him.
He will spit out the riches he swallowed;
    God will make his stomach vomit them up.
He will suck the poison of serpents;
    the fangs of an adder will kill him.
He will not enjoy the streams,
    the rivers flowing with honey and cream.
What he toiled for he must give back uneaten;
    he will not enjoy the profit from his trading.
For he has oppressed the poor and left them destitute;
    he has seized houses he did not build.

“Surely he will have no respite from his craving;
    he cannot save himself by his treasure.
Nothing is left for him to devour;
    his prosperity will not endure.
In the midst of his plenty, distress will overtake him;
    the full force of misery will come upon him.
When he has filled his belly,
    God will vent his burning anger against him
    and rain down his blows on him.
Though he flees from an iron weapon,
    a bronze-tipped arrow pierces him.
He pulls it out of his back,
    the gleaming point out of his liver.
Terrors will come over him;
    total darkness lies in wait for his treasures.
A fire unfanned will consume him
    and devour what is left in his tent.
The heavens will expose his guilt;
    the earth will rise up against him.
A flood will carry off his house,
    rushing waters on the day of God’s wrath.
Such is the fate God allots the wicked,
    the heritage appointed for them by God.” (New International Version)

Well, there you have it. Proof positive that God is merciful. The fact that the Lord kept his mouth shut after hearing all of Zophar’s supposed insight is amazing.

Illustration of Job and his friends from the Kiev Psalter, 1397

Zophar talked as if he had the inside scoop on the righteous and the wicked, and could tell the difference with ease. He is, however, another “friend” of Job who either could not or would not entertain the possibility that Job could be innocent and undeserving of such terrible suffering.

In addition, Zophar took the further step of accusing Job of being an enemy of God, and a secret sinner who was finally exposed and found out.

I have been in the position of being accused of sinful things that I did not do; and of being victimized by others who assume I must be a sinner because of a particular set of life circumstances. In some ways, it’s worse than the situation itself.

So, not only did Job experience the loss of family, property, and health; he also experienced gross misinterpretations of that experience from the very people who ought to have consoled and helped him through it.

Zophar sounds like one of those guys who always has to win an argument, always has to have an answer for everything, always talks himself into believing the things he says, and always has to have the last word.

I don’t need a “friend” like Zophar. I’ll take a friend like Jesus, who said things like this:

Now there were some present at that time who told Jesus about the Galileans whose blood Pilate had mixed with their sacrifices. Jesus answered, “Do you think that these Galileans were worse sinners than all the other Galileans because they suffered this way? I tell you, no! But unless you repent, you too will all perish. Or those eighteen who died when the tower in Siloam fell on them—do you think they were more guilty than all the others living in Jerusalem? I tell you, no! But unless you repent, you too will all perish.” (Luke 13:1-5, NIV)

Christ put the onus on repentance where it needed to be – not on the ones who suffered and died, but on the ones who offered their bogus interpretations of the suffering.

I am confident that Jesus would have had little tolerance for Zophar, and would not have treated Job in the way he was treated by his so-called friends.

Jesus extends an invitation to those who are experiencing such heavy burdens that they seem like crushing loads. That is certainly where Job was. His spiritual and emotional wounds were just as great as his painful physical situation.

Job needed help, and not people who would add to his already inconceivable burden.

Jesus said, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30, NIV)

Jesus! what a Friend for sinners! (verse 3)

By J. Wilbur Chapman, 1910

Jesus! what a Help in sorrow!
While the billows o’er me roll,
even when my heart is breaking,
He, my Comfort, helps my soul.
Hallelujah! what a Savior!
Hallelujah! what a Friend!
Saving, helping, keeping, loving;
He is with me to the end.

Amen.

Why? (Job 18:1-21)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment
Job speaks with his friends, by Gustave Doré, 1866

Then Bildad the Shuhite replied:

“When will you end these speeches?
    Be sensible, and then we can talk.
Why are we regarded as cattle
    and considered stupid in your sight?
You who tear yourself to pieces in your anger,
    is the earth to be abandoned for your sake?
    Or must the rocks be moved from their place?

“The lamp of a wicked man is snuffed out;
    the flame of his fire stops burning.
The light in his tent becomes dark;
    the lamp beside him goes out.
The vigor of his step is weakened;
    his own schemes throw him down.
His feet thrust him into a net;
    he wanders into its mesh.
A trap seizes him by the heel;
    a snare holds him fast.
A noose is hidden for him on the ground;
    a trap lies in his path.
Terrors startle him on every side
    and dog his every step.
Calamity is hungry for him;
    disaster is ready for him when he falls.
It eats away parts of his skin;
    death’s firstborn devours his limbs.
He is torn from the security of his tent
    and marched off to the king of terrors.
Fire resides in his tent;
    burning sulfur is scattered over his dwelling.
His roots dry up below
    and his branches wither above.
The memory of him perishes from the earth;
    he has no name in the land.
He is driven from light into the realm of darkness
    and is banished from the world.
He has no offspring or descendants among his people,
    no survivor where once he lived.
People of the west are appalled at his fate;
    those of the east are seized with horror.
Surely such is the dwelling of an evil man;
    such is the place of one who does not know God.” (New International Version)

It only makes sense that Bildad was expecting a sensible discussion with Job.

But it was not going to happen.

Why?

Because grief doesn’t make sense; it’s nonsensical, whimsical, and fractal.

If you’ve ever been in a discussion with someone in which the person speaks illogically, it’s likely that you tried to talk sensibly and logically, pointing out the thought process.

And if you have ever done that, it’s also likely that the person did not change one iota of what they said.

Why?

Because people are not primarily thinking creatures who happen to have emotions. Instead, people are emotional creatures who happen to think.

Why do people ask, “Why?”

Because they’re angry. It’s not a cerebral question; it’s an emotional question.

Bildad, a “friend” of Job, was exasperated with his carrying on about being innocent, contending with God, and expressing anger – which is rather funny, because Bildad himself was angry.

Why?

Because supposedly logical and controlled people have illogical and emotional issues, too.

Welcome to the human race, all of you who pride yourselves on your flawless logic and neatly formed theology.

There is a chunk of people in this world who think that everything either works, or ought to work, according to Cartesian coordinates.

A Cartesian coordinate system describes the position of points in space using perpendicular axis lines that meet at a point called the origin. Any given point’s position can be described based on its distance from the origin along each axis. In other words, Cartesian coordinates allow one to specify the location of a point.

So, why am I talking about Cartesian coordinates?

Because that is what Bildad the Shuhite was trying to do with Job, to fix him on a plane that he could understand.

Because in Bildad’s theological world, the wicked are punished by God with bad circumstances and suffering. In the Cartesian world, as the wickedness increases, so does the pain and suffering.

Hence, one is being punished by God… But does the world really operate according to Bildad’s conception of it?

Hell no! (apparently wicked people say that sort of thing when not in the Cartesian world; they should probably get right with God; and, by the way, sarcastic people are wicked, too)

Bildad went so far as to suggest that perhaps Job doesn’t know God at all.

After all, that’s where one goes in a conversation with someone who doesn’t conform to clear and tidy Cartesian-style theology.

They can preach hellfire and damnation to others, yet when another even uses the word “hell” in a phrase, that is where they’re going to go.

It seems that Bildad isn’t really making sense.

Why?

Because he’s stuck. He cannot imagine life outside of his theological bubble.

The difference between Bildad and Job is that Job will admit that he is stuck, confused, messed-up, angry, and has no decent answer to what is going on in his life.

Whereas Bildad would never admit such a thing, even though he is so far stuck in the mud that it would take a divine miracle to get him out.

In fact, it appears we all need a divine miracle.

But God is silent.

Why?

I don’t know. But I do know that it won’t be for long.

Everyone might want to brace themselves for what’s coming.

Why?

Because we will receive precisely what we’re looking for: A word from God. But it’s probably not going to be what we expect.

After all, we aren’t living in a world of Cartesian coordinates.

O Lord God almighty, Creator of heaven and earth: I admit that these people you created drive me nuts! And I’m one of them! I can barely live with myself, let alone others.

In my wondering and confusion and pain, it’s hard to focus on anything. I don’t know why everything is upside-down and topsy-turvy. Yet, somehow I know, and am convinced, that you are present with me, and that you love me.

How in the world could I accept good from you, and not bad? If you love me, and are present with me, then I believe that whatever happens from this point forward, I shall not be forsaken by you.

Contend with those who contend against me. Help me with today, for tomorrow has enough worries of its own. Amen.

Approach Everything with Humility and Wisdom (Esther 5:1-14)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment
Esther, by Marc Chagall, 1960

On the third day Esther put on her royal robes and stood in the inner court of the palace, in front of the king’s hall. The king was sitting on his royal throne in the hall, facing the entrance. When he saw Queen Esther standing in the court, he was pleased with her and held out to her the gold scepter that was in his hand. So Esther approached and touched the tip of the scepter.

Then the king asked, “What is it, Queen Esther? What is your request? Even up to half the kingdom, it will be given you.”

“If it pleases the king,” replied Esther, “let the king, together with Haman, come today to a banquet I have prepared for him.”

“Bring Haman at once,” the king said, “so that we may do what Esther asks.”

So the king and Haman went to the banquet Esther had prepared. As they were drinking wine, the king again asked Esther, “Now what is your petition? It will be given you. And what is your request? Even up to half the kingdom, it will be granted.”

Esther replied, “My petition and my request is this: If the king regards me with favor and if it pleases the king to grant my petition and fulfill my request, let the king and Haman come tomorrow to the banquet I will prepare for them. Then I will answer the king’s question.”

Haman went out that day happy and in high spirits. But when he saw Mordecai at the king’s gate and observed that he neither rose nor showed fear in his presence, he was filled with rage against Mordecai. Nevertheless, Haman restrained himself and went home.

Calling together his friends and Zeresh, his wife, Haman boasted to them about his vast wealth, his many sons, and all the ways the king had honored him and how he had elevated him above the other nobles and officials. “And that’s not all,” Haman added. “I’m the only person Queen Esther invited to accompany the king to the banquet she gave. And she has invited me along with the king tomorrow. But all this gives me no satisfaction as long as I see that Jew Mordecai sitting at the king’s gate.”

His wife Zeresh and all his friends said to him, “Have a pole set up, reaching to a height of fifty cubits, and ask the king in the morning to have Mordecai impaled on it. Then go with the king to the banquet and enjoy yourself.” This suggestion delighted Haman, and he had the pole set up. (New International Version)

Esther Comes Before the King, by Johann Boeckhorst (1604-1668)

Three days of fasting by Esther and her attendants, along with all of the Jewish people in the Persian capital city, came to the point of approach and confrontation. But it was not confrontation in the sense of in-your-face; that would get you killed in the emperor’s court.

One did not approach the king without being asked to do so. Yet, Queen Esther was the only person in a position to try and speak to the king on behalf of the Jewish people. A royal edict had been pronounced; a day was coming when they would be slaughtered and plundered. Something had to be done. And that something became a someone: Esther.

Although Esther was a queen, it was not by her own choice. She was brought into the royal court through a long process of finding a queen for the king. Esther was taken from her home; she had to participate.

It seemed as if she had no agency of her own. But there came a time when Esther had to find that personal agency and speak her own voice – even though it was at great risk to her own life, as well as the life of her people.

Perhaps because Esther had no ability to seek status, she seems to have come to the conclusion that she could be used where she was – that somehow she came to the Persian court for just such a time as this, the saving of many lives.

Queen Esther evidenced a spirit of collaboration and wisdom. She knew she could not directly confront the king concerning Haman’s evil scheme to rid the earth of Jews. She needed to approach by coming in the side door of humility and gentleness.

Thus, Esther requested the presence of King Xerxes and his right hand man Haman to a banquet. There was no arrogant demanding of justice or rights. There was only a genuine spirit of trying to do right.

All of us have others who hold positions of power over us. They make decisions which impact us significantly, whether for good or for ill. The way in which we deal with people in authority can make all the difference, not only for ourselves, but also for many other folks as well.

Power dynamics exist everywhere, in every organization, institution, family, workplace, neighborhood, and faith community. We are not in control of those structures. Yet, you and I have control of ourselves. We can choose how to respond to any given situation.

We have the opportunity to decide whether to be respectful or disrespectful, patient or impatient, wise or foolish, encouraging or discouraging, helpful or obnoxious.

Esther chose wisely. Haman chose foolishly. He was self-centered, power hungry, status conscious, angry, and downright arrogant.

Haman was obsessed with everyone giving him honor. So, when Mordecai didn’t bow to him, Haman made it his personal mission to do away with him. But that wasn’t enough. He also created a devious plan to kill all Jews.

The misuse of power is one of the most devastating sins a person can do, namely because it affects so many people and makes their lives miserable, if not dead. Abusers are typically, at their core, insecure persons who overcompensate for feeling better by pushing others down.

Abusive persons in authoritative positions is a very bad combination. The only human life they value is themselves. And they don’t care who they destroy to get what they want to feel secure and important.

Unfortunately, those in high positions sometimes (maybe oftentimes) have no idea how to properly assess the character and competence of those who want authority. Xerxes was a terrible judge of character, choosing Haman for high office and listening to him.

There are far too many persons in this world, in our own societies and institutions, who are not fit to hold any sort of public office or responsible position of power. They may talk a good line on the outside, but inside they have a hollow spot where there soul should be.

Yet, we elect them, or are okay with them in office. There’s no pushback. We can even stump for some of those morally stunted individuals. It should not be that way. We can most certainly do better, in this day and age. King Xerxes isn’t around, and there isn’t any supreme sovereign emperor calling all the shots.

We need to take responsibility, first and foremost, by developing a just and wise character within ourselves.

One’s own spiritual growth and emotional maturity will help to make wise decisions and right judgments. It is imperative that we have enough discernment to judge between the genuine article and a charlatan; and between one who has authentic potential, and one who has none.

Haman was no good for anybody but himself. And that, he even screwed up. But Esther was the right person for the right time. She evidenced a solid character, a listening spirit, and moral sensitivity.

May her tribe increase.

O Spirit of God, we ask you to help orient all our actions by your good and wise inspiration, and carry them on by your gracious assistance, so that every prayer and work of ours may always begin from you; and through you be happily ended. Amen.