Tag: anger

Be Honest (Job 42:7-9)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment
Job’s Sacrifice, by William Blake (1757-1827)

After the Lord had finished speaking to Job, he said to Eliphaz, “I am angry with you and your two friends, because you did not speak the truth about me, the way my servant Job did. Now take seven bulls and seven rams to Job and offer them as a sacrifice for yourselves. Job will pray for you, and I will answer his prayer and not disgrace you the way you deserve. You did not speak the truth about me as he did.”

Eliphaz, Bildad, and Zophar did what the Lord had told them to do, and the Lord answered Job’s prayer. (Good News Translation)

After all of Job’s terrible trouble in losing everything and everyone he cared about; after all of the longwinded speeches of his supposed friends; and after God’s breaking of silence through unanswerable questions; the epilogue of the story brings us God’s verdict concerning Job and his situation.

God finally dispenses his assessment, and renders his judgment. The Lord was not at all happy with Job’s companions; and was pleased with Job. Therefore, God made a decision against the companions, and for Job.

Four times in three verses, God refers to Job as “my servant,” but does not describe the friends as such. It is Job, and not Job’s friends, who spoke truth. Only Job spoke words consistent with reality.

At best, the friends spoke unhelpful words. At the worst, their words were hurtful and full of hubris. In retrospect, they probably should have at least kept their mouths shut. And ideally, they could have been true comforters, and consoled Job in his agony.

This gets at something which I believe we all need to get a firm hold upon: Not extending help, mercy, and consolation to those in dire straits, pisses-off God.

It irks God because it is a misrepresentation of God’s basic character, and distorts God’s true nature.

Being dishonest and pretending to be okay when one is not…

telling someone who is hurting to suck it up and confess their sin…

believing that the world operates according to good guys getting health and wealth, and bad guys getting sickness and poverty…

downright angers the holy and merciful God of the universe.

Job, unlike the Three Stooges he had as friends, affirmed what is right and true:

  • God is the Sovereign of the universe who dispenses both good and bad (Job 2:10)
  • God is the One who gives and who takes away (Job 1:21)
  • God is the Lord to whom we must bow in willing submission (Job 42:5-6)

In the dialogue with his friends, Job rightly insisted that God is sometimes an enemy, and that God’s inexplicable silence and absence is unjust and destructive.

I don’t want you to easily pass over what I just referred to, or to flip-out over it. In truth, God is both present and absent. And God’s absence hurts. Sometimes, it hurts like hell. We must affirm that God is sometimes silent. There are times when it feels like God is on vacation and is paying no attention.

I want you to get ahold of this important dimension to the spiritual life:

Human pretentions and posturing only present a false self to God and the world. That sort of behavior angers God. The Lord wants honest vulnerability.

Whereas Job’s friends insisted on maintaining theological respectability and an ordered theological system, Job essentially said, “To hell with all that!”

And Job was right.

Job contended with God. He cried, yelled, and exposed his innermost thoughts and feelings to God. Job was real. No phoniness existed with him. Yet, Job did not forsake God, curse God, or say there was no God.

The genuine spiritual life is always a tricky and risky combination of devotion and confrontation toward God.

Job presented his true self to God.

Job’s friends presented to God what they believed God wanted to see and hear.

There is a big difference between those two approaches.

God affirmed Job. God was against Job’s friends.

Maybe today it is necessary to rethink what you have always believed it is which gets God’s affirmation, and what raises God’s ire.

If we cannot be honest about what we are really thinking, and about how we are really doing, then we are hopeless people. In that state, no one can help us. And God is not pleased.

The final verdict of God is that only the prayers of one who speaks truth, like Job, will be effectively heard. Less honest prayers, like those of Job’s wife and friends, are foolish and ineffective.

One of the big overall messages of the Book of Job is this: For God’s sake, be honest!

My own culture is one of Midwest nice. That’s a nice way of saying that Midwesterners are mostly dishonest creatures. Every Midwesterner I know, understands being nice and polite to someone’s face, and then speaking gossip and slander to their back.

Ask any Midwestern American how they are doing, and they’ll tell you, “Just fine,” or “Great!” or “The sun is shining,” or some other deflection or blathering lie about how they are really doing. More than once, I have actually heard a depressed person with suicidal ideation tell another person that they are “doing fine today.”

That sort of claptrap gets us nowhere, especially with God. The Lord is okay with you and I telling him what we really think, even if we are extremely upset with God. God isn’t bothered by our anger, yelling, or messed-up thinking. But God is bothered by our pretending, our dishonesty, and our false presentations.

None of this means that we must wear our heart on our sleeve. In fact, I have found that persons who declare to me that they “tell it like it is,” are some of the most false people on the planet. It’s usually a sign that I’m not going to get from them how they are really feeling. It usually means they’re angry, and want to talk smack against someone, without ever examining themselves.

Don’t be a jerk. There are nice jerks, and obnoxious jerks, but in the end, they’re all just jerks. You and I really can speak honest words of truth, without being a jerk about it.

Job was honest, real, raw, hurt, angry, sad, lonely, and grieving out of his mind. And he was no jerk. And God affirmed him.

Personally, I’d rather have God’s affirmation than anyone else’s. How about you?

Almighty God, help us to speak and act truthfully in all situations. May we be honest with ourselves and with others, building trust and integrity in our relationships. Thank you for your example of truth and honesty. Help us to follow in your footsteps and to live with authenticity.

Guide us to be honest even when it is difficult, recognizing that honesty is the foundation of trust and respect. Help us to confront our own falsehoods and to seek the truth in all aspects of our lives. May we create environments where honesty is valued and encouraged, fostering open and transparent communication.

We pray for those who struggle with honesty, asking for your guidance and support in their journey towards truthfulness. Thank you for the clarity and peace that comes from living honestly. Help us to embrace and uphold this value every day. Amen.

Don’t Assume (Job 32:1-22)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment
The Wrath of Elihu, by William Blake, 1805

Finally, these three men stopped arguing with Job, because he refused to admit he was guilty.

Elihu from Buz was there, and he had become upset with Job for blaming God instead of himself. He was also angry with Job’s three friends for not being able to prove that Job was wrong. Elihu was younger than these three, and he let them speak first. But he became irritated when they could not answer Job, and he said to them:

I am much younger than you,
so I have shown respect
    by keeping silent.
I once believed age
    was the source of wisdom;
now I truly realize
    wisdom comes from God.
Age is no guarantee of wisdom
    and understanding.
That’s why I ask you
    to listen to me.

I eagerly listened
    to each of your arguments,
but not one of you proved
    Job to be wrong.
You shouldn’t say,
“We know what’s right!
    Let God punish him.”
Job hasn’t spoken against me,
and so I won’t answer him
    with your arguments.

All of you are shocked;
    you don’t know what to say.
But am I to remain silent,
just because you
    have stopped speaking?
No! I will give my opinion,
because I have so much to say,
    that I can’t keep quiet.
I am like a swollen wineskin,
and I will burst
    if I don’t speak.
I don’t know how to be unfair
    or to flatter anyone—
if I did, my Creator
    would quickly destroy me! (Contemporary English Version)

Job and his three friends had talked themselves out. There were plenty of words and frustration, with nothing left but an impasse. We anticipate hearing from God….

But there is yet another who was present with Job and his companions. Elihu was a young man in tow with the older three friends. He respectfully held back and observed all the proceedings between the four men. As he watched, the angrier he became, to the point of feeling the need to speak up and offer his own voice concerning Job’s terrible suffering and trouble.

Elihu was angry because he believed Job was setting up himself as more righteous than God. And he was also perturbed with the three friends. He viewed them as bungling their argument against Job, offering no convincing answers.

Within the scope of what Elihu and the friends were talking about, the arguments were indeed found lacking. No one had the necessary wisdom to handle Job’s case.

But therein lies the problem. The assumptions are presuppositions which underlie all the arguments and speeches were off. The friends simply assumed Job was sinful, because they presupposed that anyone undergoing such terrible suffering is being punished by God.

Therefore, all of the bluster was doomed to go nowhere. Underneath all of the exhausting chaos was a cosmic drama which none of the human actors were privy to. In other words, nobody knew what they were talking about.

God only seems to be silent and absent from the perspective of us humans. We are an impatient people. Much like Elihu, we sit on our hands and bite our lips, waiting to get out what we want to say.

I wonder how much of Elihu’s listening wasn’t actually listening, but was thinking about what he was going to say when he got his chance. Job’s friends were ineffective in proving Job wrong and guilty before God, according to Elihu.

But if any of us begin our thinking and our speaking with assumptions and presuppositions which are off base, then it’s likely that nearly all of our thoughts and words will be unhelpful and even hurtful.

Too many people have a compulsion to speak and get their own opinions out. Few persons, however, have the same sort of compulsion to truly observe, listen, and learn. So, what we typically get are Elihu-like belching of speech – which may make the person speaking feel better, yet leaves everyone else groaning for them to keep their mouth shut.

An unteachable spirit which values one’s own thoughts and opinions over others is the mark of a fool, and not a sage. There ought never to be more wind coming from someone’s mouth than from the weather.

Unfortunately, many people claim to know and understand more than they actually do. And just because someone occupies a high position does not necessarily mean they know what they’re talking about.

In our anger and perturbed states of mind, we vent and talk too much, as if we have the corner on truth. Yet, how much of our talking is really worth others listening to us?

Instead of assuming we already know what is happening with another, there are questions we can ask ourselves, which may help guide us to speak more truthfully with helpful, not hurtful, words.

The following few questions can help orient us with compassion toward what another is saying:

  • What is the main point being made?
  • What might be going through their mind when they say that?
  • What need do they have that they are trying to satisfy?
  • What is the motivation of the person speaking?

Just as important is our own self-awareness. These questions can help us monitor ourselves as we listen and respond to others:

  • How am I feeling right now in this moment?
  • What do I need right now?
  • Why does that particular statement or opinion irritate me so much?
  • How am I presenting myself right now – my affect, posture, and eye contact?

We can also ask questions of God during a conversation:

  • Will you please help me to understand the person and what is being said?
  • How does this square with my understanding of you and your Word?
  • Which values – that are important to You – apply to this discussion?
  • What do you want me to say and do?

You will say the wrong thing
    if you talk too much—
so be sensible and watch
    what you say. (Proverbs 10:19, CEV)

The Book of Job would likely look a lot different if Job’s friends had taken such a wise saying to heart.

The following is a prayer from St. Francis of Assisi:

Lord, make us instruments of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let us sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is discord, union;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
where there is sadness, joy.
Grant that we may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. Amen.

Why? (Job 18:1-21)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment
Job speaks with his friends, by Gustave Doré, 1866

Then Bildad the Shuhite replied:

“When will you end these speeches?
    Be sensible, and then we can talk.
Why are we regarded as cattle
    and considered stupid in your sight?
You who tear yourself to pieces in your anger,
    is the earth to be abandoned for your sake?
    Or must the rocks be moved from their place?

“The lamp of a wicked man is snuffed out;
    the flame of his fire stops burning.
The light in his tent becomes dark;
    the lamp beside him goes out.
The vigor of his step is weakened;
    his own schemes throw him down.
His feet thrust him into a net;
    he wanders into its mesh.
A trap seizes him by the heel;
    a snare holds him fast.
A noose is hidden for him on the ground;
    a trap lies in his path.
Terrors startle him on every side
    and dog his every step.
Calamity is hungry for him;
    disaster is ready for him when he falls.
It eats away parts of his skin;
    death’s firstborn devours his limbs.
He is torn from the security of his tent
    and marched off to the king of terrors.
Fire resides in his tent;
    burning sulfur is scattered over his dwelling.
His roots dry up below
    and his branches wither above.
The memory of him perishes from the earth;
    he has no name in the land.
He is driven from light into the realm of darkness
    and is banished from the world.
He has no offspring or descendants among his people,
    no survivor where once he lived.
People of the west are appalled at his fate;
    those of the east are seized with horror.
Surely such is the dwelling of an evil man;
    such is the place of one who does not know God.” (New International Version)

It only makes sense that Bildad was expecting a sensible discussion with Job.

But it was not going to happen.

Why?

Because grief doesn’t make sense; it’s nonsensical, whimsical, and fractal.

If you’ve ever been in a discussion with someone in which the person speaks illogically, it’s likely that you tried to talk sensibly and logically, pointing out the thought process.

And if you have ever done that, it’s also likely that the person did not change one iota of what they said.

Why?

Because people are not primarily thinking creatures who happen to have emotions. Instead, people are emotional creatures who happen to think.

Why do people ask, “Why?”

Because they’re angry. It’s not a cerebral question; it’s an emotional question.

Bildad, a “friend” of Job, was exasperated with his carrying on about being innocent, contending with God, and expressing anger – which is rather funny, because Bildad himself was angry.

Why?

Because supposedly logical and controlled people have illogical and emotional issues, too.

Welcome to the human race, all of you who pride yourselves on your flawless logic and neatly formed theology.

There is a chunk of people in this world who think that everything either works, or ought to work, according to Cartesian coordinates.

A Cartesian coordinate system describes the position of points in space using perpendicular axis lines that meet at a point called the origin. Any given point’s position can be described based on its distance from the origin along each axis. In other words, Cartesian coordinates allow one to specify the location of a point.

So, why am I talking about Cartesian coordinates?

Because that is what Bildad the Shuhite was trying to do with Job, to fix him on a plane that he could understand.

Because in Bildad’s theological world, the wicked are punished by God with bad circumstances and suffering. In the Cartesian world, as the wickedness increases, so does the pain and suffering.

Hence, one is being punished by God… But does the world really operate according to Bildad’s conception of it?

Hell no! (apparently wicked people say that sort of thing when not in the Cartesian world; they should probably get right with God; and, by the way, sarcastic people are wicked, too)

Bildad went so far as to suggest that perhaps Job doesn’t know God at all.

After all, that’s where one goes in a conversation with someone who doesn’t conform to clear and tidy Cartesian-style theology.

They can preach hellfire and damnation to others, yet when another even uses the word “hell” in a phrase, that is where they’re going to go.

It seems that Bildad isn’t really making sense.

Why?

Because he’s stuck. He cannot imagine life outside of his theological bubble.

The difference between Bildad and Job is that Job will admit that he is stuck, confused, messed-up, angry, and has no decent answer to what is going on in his life.

Whereas Bildad would never admit such a thing, even though he is so far stuck in the mud that it would take a divine miracle to get him out.

In fact, it appears we all need a divine miracle.

But God is silent.

Why?

I don’t know. But I do know that it won’t be for long.

Everyone might want to brace themselves for what’s coming.

Why?

Because we will receive precisely what we’re looking for: A word from God. But it’s probably not going to be what we expect.

After all, we aren’t living in a world of Cartesian coordinates.

O Lord God almighty, Creator of heaven and earth: I admit that these people you created drive me nuts! And I’m one of them! I can barely live with myself, let alone others.

In my wondering and confusion and pain, it’s hard to focus on anything. I don’t know why everything is upside-down and topsy-turvy. Yet, somehow I know, and am convinced, that you are present with me, and that you love me.

How in the world could I accept good from you, and not bad? If you love me, and are present with me, then I believe that whatever happens from this point forward, I shall not be forsaken by you.

Contend with those who contend against me. Help me with today, for tomorrow has enough worries of its own. Amen.

Wise Living Is Clean Living (Proverbs 15:1-17)

On By Tim EhrhardtIn Christian Spirituality Blog, Daily Bible Reading Blog, Year BLeave a comment

A gentle answer quiets anger, but a harsh one stirs it up.

When wise people speak, they make knowledge attractive, but stupid people spout nonsense.

The Lord sees what happens everywhere; he is watching us, whether we do good or evil.

Kind words bring life, but cruel words crush your spirit.

It is foolish to ignore what your parents taught you; it is wise to accept their correction.

Righteous people keep their wealth, but the wicked lose theirs when hard times come.

Knowledge is spread by people who are wise, not by fools.

The Lord is pleased when good people pray, but hates the sacrifices that the wicked bring him.

The Lord hates the ways of evil people, but loves those who do what is right.

If you do what is wrong, you will be severely punished; you will die if you do not let yourself be corrected.

Not even the world of the dead can keep the Lord from knowing what is there; how then can we hide our thoughts from God?

Conceited people do not like to be corrected; they never ask for advice from those who are wiser.

When people are happy, they smile, but when they are sad, they look depressed.

Intelligent people want to learn, but stupid people are satisfied with ignorance.

The life of the poor is a constant struggle, but happy people always enjoy life.

Better to be poor and fear the Lord than to be rich and in trouble.

Better to eat vegetables with people you love than to eat the finest meat where there is hate. (Good News Translation)

Here is today’s Proverbs lesson in my own colloquial words:

A calm and kind response sucks the anger out of the room, but hot-headed words set the place on hellfire.

A level-headed person gives helpful answers, but a know-it-all only keeps on babbling nonsense.

Just because you cannot see God, doesn’t mean that God cannot see you, both the good and the bad.

Kind words given to another person are life-giving, but unkind words catapulted at a person ends up crushing their spirit.

You can tell a fool by how their refusal to accept counsel from their parents, but a wise person freely receives parental instruction.

Wise folk understand they need to save for a rainy day, but fools spend everything they have, then wonder why they’re in dire straits.

Wisdom and common sense are akin to one another; foolishness and nonsense are two peas in a pod.

The Lord perks up when the righteous pray, but does a face palm when the wicked offer up anything.

The ways of evil people make the Lord nauseous, but the way of the righteous is delightful to God.

A stupid dog doesn’t live very long, because he won’t heed his training or learn from any natural consequences.

If God can see everything that goes on with death and destruction, why would not the Lord see all things within your own heart?

Prickly people won’t listen to advice, and they refuse to consult anyone when making decisions.

Truthful persons smile when they’re happy and frown when they’re sad, but falsehood smiles when it’s sad and frowns when it’s happy.

Learners are curious about life, but ignorant folk only feed on tabloid information.

Once in survival mode, it’s hard to ever get out of it; but those who thrive have learned how to be content in any circumstance.

It’s a whole lot better to be poor and right with God, than to be rich and on the wrong side of the Lord.

Peanut butter sandwiches eaten on the floor with love are much more delicious than eating a filet mignon with hatred around the table.

Our words reflect what is truly the attitude of our heart. And our attitudes betray what we actually think about God and others.

If you drop a foolish person into a roomful of people, it’s like putting a rotten egg in with the rest of the eggs when making an omelet. Or, to put it according to an old adage, “One bad apple spoils the whole bushel basket of them.”

This is why it’s the responsibility of everyone to develop wisdom and a virtuous life. A faith community, a neighborhood, a workplace, a family, or any group of people are adversely affected whenever there’s one arrogant fool amongst them.

But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: “Be holy, because I am holy.” (1 Peter 1:15-16, NIV)

It only takes one drop of arsenic to ruin a gallon of water and make it undrinkable. And if you choose to drink it anyway, well, you’ll suffer the consequences.

And this is why purity of heart, righteousness, justice, and goodness are so very important. It’s also why holiness is placed as a premium in Holy Scripture, because impurity ruins the community and defiles any group of people.

For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness. (James 3:16-18, NIV)

Wise living is clean living, in every sense of a person’s complete self – in body, mind, emotions, and spirit. The Book of Proverbs can help us with that.

O God, by whom the meek are guided in judgment, and light rises up in darkness for the godly: Grant us, in all our doubts and uncertainties, the grace to ask what you would have us to do, so that the Spirit of wisdom may save us from all false choices, and that in your light we may see light, and in your straight path may not stumble. Amen.